Saturday, May 31, 2008

Sexy Summer Movies

Glamour recently came out with a list of their top 12 Sexy Summer Movies. I would probably add a few to their list, but here's what they selected:

Bull Durham

Little Darlings

A Walk on the Moon

The Blue Lagoon

Top Gun

How Stella Got Her Groove Back

From Here to Eternity

Untamed Heart

The Notebook

Swimming Pool


Body Heat

I haven't seen all of the above movies, but I don't think I'd choose them for the sexy summer movie theme. What movies would you select?

Friday, May 30, 2008

Book Review: Nordie's at Noon

I can't recall where I first heard of this book, Nordie's at Noon, but I got the chills when I read the subtitle: The Personal Stories of Four Women "Too Young" for Breast Cancer.

Breast cancer kills approximately forty thousand women each year.

These are the true stories of the emotional ups and downs that four women faced during their mid twenties and early thirties after being diagnosed with breast cancer.

Like any group of young women, they talked about their careers, their relationships, their dreams and more serious issues that brought them together once a month at a local Nordstrom department store: cancer.
Jen (diagnosed at 27): I decided to focus on living and taking chances. I would have no regrets whether I lived to a hundred or to thirty. I was sent here for a purpose: to raise my little boy and help other women who may follow in my footsteps. That's what I would do. (p. 149)

I am thankful that I can appreciate my parents now while they are still living, and I look forward to the day when my children have their own children and can begin to understand how very much I love them.
(p. 173) Two life-changing experiences had happened to me at the same time. I brought a child into this world and faced my own mortality. Either one would have been a challenge on its own; facing both at the same time was pretty overwhelming. (p. 190)

Patti (diagnosed at 24): You don't realize that hormones are such an integral part of you until they're taken away. Most women lose their hormones gradually. Mine were gone in an instant. (p. 187)
A true celebration of friendship and living to the fullest, Nordie's at Noon is also a book that will encourage women everywhere to be proactive with their health - and to realize that no one is "too young" for breast cancer.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Thoughts After Visiting Dad's House

I'm a single, working mom, but I'm one of the lucky ones. My son's father is equally involved and just as equally interested in his son's education, etc.

When people hear that I'm a single mom, they typically say something like, "I don't know how you do it on your own." Well, let me be the first to tell you that there is no way in hell that I could've gotten this far on my own.

Even though my parents and extended family and friends are thousands of miles away, they've been an amazing support system for me. I've also created a wonderful commUNITY here in the last several years that is made up of dozens of moms and dads (single or otherwise). And yes, my former husband has been a big help, too.

When we got married, we both knew that we wanted children. In fact, we were so certain that we wanted a child that we got married to ensure that it would happen. You know, "First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage."

After a few years together, we discovered that we are the best parents we can possibly be to our son when we're not living together.

Over at Dad's House, I would imagine that he's just as involved in his children's life as my former husband is. We are on a 2-3-2 schedule (if anyone is interested or knows what that even means) but Dad steps up and has our son during the times I'm gone on business (quite often).

When I started my company and began to narrow my focus on what I would be specializing in as a Certified Parent Educator, my first thought was wanting to work with single parents. That focus then changed to working with any and all parents since I want to help anyone who is willing to sit down and work on being a better mom or dad than they already are.

I can't imagine having to be a full-time mom to my son without his dad in the picture. We're not all in the same house any more, and it's often times quite frustrating, but the three of us will always be a family. And family will always come first.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

In Response...

Over at Dad's House, there's an interesting discussion that's been catching the eye of many a blogger (single parents, especially). Here are my two cents:

1. Men are creepy. My male "friend" of over four years ended up confessing his feelings for me recently and I was TOTALLY creeped out since I had been sharing info about my life with him over the past several years (including details about my current relationship and how I feel towards the man in my life). ICK. I can never look at him the same way again.

2. A woman doesn't want to hear that she's attractive or sexy from just anyone (and if she does then she has issues). Most women only want to hear this from a guy she's totally into or finds attractive and sexy too. But, the problem is, how does a guy know if he falls into this category or not?

3. The fact that most men admit to looking at women in a sexual way (regardless of the circumstances) should serve to elicit a strong reaction from all involved. It should also go without saying that men do need women (and vice versa).

4. David wrote: "For a woman to admit she needs a man reveals vulnerability." David, it all depends on the circumstance or what she is really saying she needs. Perhaps she needs his attention. Perhaps she needs him to fulfill her fantasies in a physical way. Perhaps she needs him for a one night stand or a lifelong commitment. Perhaps she just needs to feel he wants her so she can turn around and reject him. Let's not generalize here. And to MsSingleMama - I'm not referring to you in any of the above scenarios.

Let's face it, women have been using the power of their sexuality for generations to get what they want or "need" and that isn't about to change anytime soon. (I'm not saying I agree with this or that I myself do this but then again, I'm not saying that I don't.) And for just as long, men have been trying to figure out ways to use that power against us.

I could go on but I'm afraid my blog isn't just about relationships or sexuality. But I will end with this: I need the men in my life for different things and I believe admitting that only makes me stronger.

Men, women, single or in a relationship - what do you think? Obviously the convo caused a strong emotional reaction from those who've read and commented so far...

Baby Loves Disco

I've always wanted to go to Aubergine but have been avoiding the long lines outside the popular nightclub since it first opened. I thought I'd wait until it was no longer "new" before finally checking it out, but I just never made that happen. Can you believe I'm finally going - for the first time - with my 4-year-old for a Baby Loves Disco event? I can't wait.

Sponsored by San Diego Bargain Mama, Rattle N Roll, and several others, this is one dance party that San Diego parents - and their little ones - will not hesitate to stand in line for!

Find out where Baby Loves Disco events are happening in your area. For more events, check out the Happy Healthy Hip Parents meetup group.

Monday, May 26, 2008

An Intentional Single Father

I discovered this morning and have been reading interesting articles that I think many parents - both moms and dads - can relate to. This one in particular, on intentional parents, intrigued me (the article starts below the photo). I'm curious as to what others think about these unique families.

I have thought about this myself, having another child on my own, but I know that the timing is not right just yet. There are many women who choose to raise children on their own and I'm sure there are many more men out there, like John, who do the same. I'm assuming they don't receive the same support from society as females do.

John: I think people who let romantic relationships get mixed up with raising children are being impulsive and self indulgent. They usually end up creating a lot of stress and unhappiness for themselves and their kids.

FatherMag: Some people might say your approach isn't the 'natural' way of doing things.

John: Neither is flying, except for birds. But a lot of people will get in an airplane if it takes them where they want to go.

What do you think?

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Someone Needs a Time Out

I LOVE this commercial! I just saw it on TV for the first time (I hardly ever have the TV on) and immediately looked it up on YouTube.

The Redirecting Children's Behavior program that I am certified to teach does not endorse time outs, unless it's done like this!

Two Things

Two Names I Go By:

1. Sondra
2. Mom

Two Things I'm Wearing Right Now:

1. underwear
2. pink robe

Two Things I Want (or have) in a Relationship:

1. Honesty
2. Support

Two of My Favorite Things to do:

1. Spend time with my son
2. Shop

Two Things I Did Last Night:

1. Enjoyed wine tasting with other Moms
2. Played BUNCO for the first time and laughed my *** off

Two Things I Ate Last Night:

1. Chipotle sauce & cream cheese (YUM)
2. Chocolate

Two people I Last Talked To:

1. Natascha & Erika (during the car ride home last night)
2. My man (he called this morning but let me go to help set up for a birthday party for a one-year-old)

Two Things I'm Doing Tomorrow:

1. Celebrating Memorial Day with my son
2. NOT working!

Two Longest Car Rides I’ve taken:

1. Maple Grove, MN to Portland, OR (1,715 miles) - August 1997
2. Prescott, WI to San Diego, CA (2,017 miles) - June 1999

Two Favorite Holidays:

1. Christmas
2. My son’s birthday

Two Favorite Beverages:

1. Pinot Noir
2. Voss Bottled Water

Two Favorite Types of Food:

1. Sushi
2. Mexican

Two Favorite Places:

1. There’s no place like home.
2. Home is where your mom is.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

The Hard Questions

My best friend of over fourteen years - whom I've known for over half my life - is getting married this fall. It's her birthday today so I want to dedicate this post to her and her future hubby (who I haven't had the opportunity to meet yet).

A few weeks back I picked up a copy of The Hard Questions by Susan Piver. Ever since my marriage ended, I've been very interested in books dealing with relationships and marriage.

This book contains 100 Questions to Ask Before You Say "I Do" and I hope that those who are thinking about getting married, planning the wedding or wondering if their current partner is "the one," will take the time to read this and answer these questions along with their significant other.

Here are just a few questions that can be found in the book:
  • How much will we spend on furnishings? Who will make these decisions? What factors are important in making these decisions (price, quality, style)? Do we want to be free to decorate as our tastes change, or do we expect to invest in quality that will last a lifetime?
  • What are our categories of expense (rent, clothing, insurance, travel)? How much do we spend monthly, annually, in each category? How much do we want to be able to spend? Now? In one year? Five years? Ten years?
  • Outside of the office, how much of our work time are we willing to put into work? What place does the other's job have in our home life? Do we have an office at home? Do we bring work home? How much time is spent working at home?
  • Are we satisfied with the frequency of lovemaking? How do we cope when our desire levels are unmatched?
  • Is each of us happy with the other's approach to health? Does one have habits or tendencies that concern the other (smoking, excessive dieting, poor diet)?
  • What place does the other's family play in our family life? How often do we visit or socialize together? If we have out-of-town relatives, will we ask them to visit us for extended periods? How often? For what length of time?
  • Who will take care of our child if we both work? How does each partner feel about daycare?
  • Which of us is responsible for creating community? Is one partner more outgoing than the other? Does one partner have a greater need for outside friendships and groups?
  • What place do spiritual / religious beliefs play in our home and home life?
These are just a few questions from the list of 100 to really think about your own thoughts, beliefs and expectations in aspects that affect your marriage, as well as your partner's. Some of the answers might come to you easily. Some might be questions you have never thought about. All are essential to ask (and answer) before saying, "I do."