Grandparenting

My mom, aka Grandma Sylvie, inspires me and has encouraged my writing ever since I was a little girl. She was the one who told me about the Examiner and told me to apply. I got accepted within a week and have been having a great time writing for them - and making money!

I asked her to put some guest posts together for me so that I can have a grandparent's voice and wisdom of her years of parenting experience to share and include here. She's awesome and continues to inspire me with everything she says and does. Here's her latest:

I worked the gift shop (volunteer work) yesterday and saw a good idea for me to start journaling again. I haven't journaled for about 10 years or longer.

There was a book there called "Simplicity Journal." On each page were the words: Happy, Funny, Heart, Good, Challenge, Learned, and Other Thoughts with enough space next to each word to write one word to a short paragraph.

My words for today are:

Happy- I am happy that Hip_M0M called me while on her road trip. It was good to talk to her and hear her voice.

Healthy- I took a walk and walked farther than planned. I saw an old man getting his mail and he told me to keep walking. He wished he could walk but can't. It is amazing how a few words of encouragement can make this 58-year-old body move.

Hip- I play my favorite music. Right now I am listening to the soundtrack of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

Grandparenting- I look at the grandsons' photos and pray that they are happy and safe.

Take care and keep smiling.

Grandma Says I Can!

The Juicebox Jungle has a new video up this week, entitled "Grandma Says I Can!" which is all about the relationship between our children and their grandparents. Many parents bite their tongues when it comes to the situations our parents or in-laws let our offspring get away with. They never let us get away with those same things when we were their age.

My mom and dad live thousands of miles away. My son's other grandma lives even further. So, needless to say, I pretty much accept the fact that their role will consist of some spoiling behavior and I just shake my head when I see my parents give my son chocolate in between meals.

My mom (aka Grandma Sylvie) continues to inspire me. She takes care of my nephews at least once a week and even survived an overnight with the 1-year-old.

She sent me some great quotes about being a grandparent and I suspect there's probably many more which she felt the need to filter out!

"Grandchildren: The only people who get more out of you than the IRS." - Gene Perret

"My grandchild has taught me what true love means. It means watching Scooby-Doo cartoons while the basketball game is on another channel." - Gene Perret

If you're a grandparent, please share your favorite quote with us. If you have a parent (or grandparent) in your life who can appreciate this, please pass it along. We wouldn't be here if it weren't for them!

Feeling Homesick

I'm visiting my family & friends this week in Minnesota, celebrating many different things, including the wedding of my college friends, my nephew's first birthday and of course, Father's Day.

It's always a whirlwind of a trip whenever we come, trying to cram in as many family visits as possible and squeeze in as many happy hours with friends. One thing I've really been reminded of this time is how precious family truly is

My parents have been keeping an eye on my son while I get some work done (like right now) and my sister and her husband took on an extra child for the night while I enjoyed the wedding and reception of my friends of nearly 15 years.

For those of you who have parents or in-laws close by, be grateful for them, even if there are things they do or say that you might not agree with

I'll miss my family when we get back to our house, but as they say, "Home is where your Mom is" and even though my son is a little homesick now (missing California), my version of being homesick is a little different and I'll miss my family and friends when I return to our place and lives in Southern California

Luckily, my mom and I have discussed having her a bit more involved long-distance, which means she'll be writing on this blog on occasion, offering some grandmotherly advice and providing some great stories about her own childhood and how parenting has changed now that she's a grandmother.

Stay tuned for more...

What Moms Really Think about Grandparents!

A few months back I was asked to provide input for an article that Susan Avery was putting together for Grandparents.com. She asked for my opinion on whether or not my mom or mother-in-law interferes or if I could offer some general advice for grandparents.

I was happy to share my two cents, which appears in her slide show, along with over a dozen other suggestions from some pretty amazing Mommy Bloggers.

Here's a list of the bloggers who are included in the slide show and whom I am honored to be listed alongside:

• Tara Mandy from Stroller Traffic
• Michelle Little from One Chic Mama
• Valerie Gray from Mom Knows it All
• Ada Calhoun from Babble
• Sue Waite-Langley from Creative Tutors
• Kimberly Coleman from Mom in the City
• Ashley Sanders from Boss Sanders
• Cheryl Lage from Twinfatuation
• Deb Steenhagen from Mom of 3 Girls
• Diane Kidman from dk Mommy Spot
• Jennifer Singer from Momma Said
• Glennia Campbell from The Silent T
• Debbie Arora from Missives from Suburbia
• Anna Fader from Mommy Poppins
• Dawn Yun from The Writing Mamas Salon
• Carissa Rogers from Good N Crazy
• Jill Smokler from Scary Mommy
• Kim Kotecki from Kim & Jason Escape Adulthood
• Jo-Lynne Shane from Musings of a Housewife
• Debbie Abrams Kaplan from frisco kids
• Holli Gould from Life is What You Make It
• Maggie Cheung from Mighty Maggie
• Michele Dortch from The Integrated Mother
• Heather L. Sanders from Oh My Stinkin Heck
  

Some highlights from the advice to grandparents (in my opinion):

Don't poo-poo your kid's parenting rules, especially when it comes to safety. While you likely did a fine job raising children without such modern gadgets as car seats, door gates, and electrical outlet covers, your kids are relying on solid modern data — and in some cases, laws — to make their safety decisions. And frankly, they're just trying to do what they think is right for your grandchildren.

The grandparents want to send cash in an envelope for a 7-year-old's birthday. This is like a non-gift to a kid. Instead? Schedule an afternoon, just grandma and granddaughter. Go get a milk shake. Nothing else. Just time.

Grandparents, be young again with your grandkids. Get on the floor and roll around with them, even if you need help getting back up. If you're in a wheelchair, take them for rides! You don't have to spend a lot of money to make memories. Play checkers. Bake cookies. Go fishing. Read stories. Dress up. Catch fireflies. Eat ice cream. Let your grandkids see the silliest parts of you.

All I really want from you is the opportunity to nap. Just come over, take control of your grandchildren and send me to my room. That's truly all I want from you.

Now, my advice to you, after reading this: Go call your grandparents.

Long-Distance Love

Illustrator Valeri Gorbachev is an amazing artist and she teams up with author Sandra Horning in The Giant Hug, a wonderful book about sharing love and spreading joy.

In this adorable picture book, little Owen wants to send his Grandma a hug even though she lives far away. He comes up with a great plan that requires the participation of many people in the community, sending a hug to his Grandma in a unique and inspiring way.

Readers will be able to recognize the power of love in this story. It makes a great gift for far away grandparents and a wonderful book to read with your child when a hug is needed.

Check out more great children's books for Valentine's Day (or any day).

When Did This Turn Into a Sex Blog?

Perhaps from the lack of sex I'm actually having, I've turned to reading about sex and discussing it here on my blog.

Oh well. I'm getting satisfaction and pleasure from my writing (not in that way), so I feel the need to continue but will try not to overdo the sex talk.

Speaking of sex talk, people all over the world are talking about sex and education, and teens, thanks to the recent announcement about Sarah Palin's new status as grandmother-to-be. That's right, I'm focusing instead on her role in the family matter rather than her daughter's. I have my opinions on the situation, but who am I to talk? Enough people are doing that already.

I do, however, feel the need to remind everyone, no matter what our political or religious views, about how important it is to talk to our children - from a young age - about sex and providing them with opportunities to discuss questions they have. I can't stress enough to my young son how I want him to be able to talk to me about anything. Even at his young age, I'm trying to open the doors of communication between us so that when the time comes for those difficult, if not awkward conversations, it'll be less likely to be an embarrassing discussion (for either of us).

Clearly, if you read this blog, I'm open to talking about my views on, well, pretty much everything, so there's probably less likelihood that my son will impregnate a young girl before they turn 18, right? WRONG. Just because I am open to discussing issues about sex, contraception, birth control, abstinence and giving him all of the information necessary to make his own decisions, they will in fact be his own decisions and regardless of how safe and smart young people are, life happens.

Alright, I said I wasn't going to share my thoughts on the whole matter, and I haven't, really. Have I?

By the way, for those living in the San Diego area, I'm teaching a parenting workshop in just a few weeks on this very topic: Speaking to Young People about Sex. It's not easy for everyone to be as open as I am about these sorts of things, especially with children. I'm hoping that the course will help parents understand their sexual values and focus a bit more on what types of information they want to share with their children before their child comes to them with questions.

Do you talk to your children about pregnancy and protecting themselves from STDs?

Advice from Grandma Sylvie

Being a parent is one role that never ends. My mom (aka Grandma Sylvie) has always been a great role model for me as she and I had an amazing relationship while I was growing up and an even stronger one now that I have a child of my own.

She's the same Grandma who told me she was going to start practicing her cartwheels when I found out I was pregnant. When my son was just two years old, she made my day (and lasting memories) by doing cartwheels in the park during our family vacation Hawaii while my son laughed and tried to imitate her.

Just today she sent me an email that provided some great advice and lovely thoughts on grandparenting- worthy of sharing and passing on to your loved ones (in my opinion):

Life:

The older you get the better you know yourself.

Love:

It is the greatest gift you can give someone, although you may not get love back in return.

Parenting:

Proved to me that there is a God - and God's mom helped me through it!

Favorite Grandparent Perks:

Grandchildren are the best part of life and worth waiting for.
I love their laughter and honesty.
They know how to make your day just by holding your hand,
giving you a hug or smiling at you with a twinkle in their eyes that makes you feel special.
I am always looking forward to the next visit with them.

You'll be hearing more from Grandma Sylvie in the near future. She's preparing for Grandbaby #3 which means she'll probably be doing cartwheels in the waiting room while my sister's delivering.