Sunday, September 28, 2008

Second First Date

After a successful and fun meet 'n greet, my new male friend picked me up last night for our first official date. Let me step back a few days though to share with you how the week went.

Our meet 'n greet was last Sunday and I had a really good time. I thought he had a good time as well. In fact, he had mentioned a "next time," so I assumed that we'd communicate afterward about seeing each other again. Three days went by without hearing from him and I was a bit concerned. I was confused. I was disappointed. It's not easy to get back into the dating scene, especially when it involves searching through numerous online profiles, trying to determine how to reach out to those who peak my curiosity.


On Wednesday afternoon, he finally called but, because I was at work, I wasn't able to take the call. He did leave a message and I found myself laughing out loud when I listened to it. He joked about how he had read a Guy's Rule Book on Dating and noted that it had officially been 72 hours since our first meeting so it was now the opportune time to follow up. Then he simply asked if he could take me to dinner on Saturday and left it at that.

I had to arrange for a babysitter in order to confirm that I could go out but that only took a few minutes of text messaging to schedule. One of my son's former teachers who lives in our neighborhood agreed to come by to hang out with him so I could go on this date. She's married with no children of her own (yet) and is someone my son feels completely comfortable with. What would I do without teachers like her?

Saturday arrives and it's amazingly hot out. I'm sweating already because I'm a little nervous and I'm not quite sure what to wear. I change my outfit a record number of times before finally deciding on a black top and jean skirt. Casual for a first date, I realize, but since I was overdressed for our meet 'n greet, I figured I could get away with it.

I had no idea where he would be taking me but this is what has always intrigued me about dates. Normally, I would be a bit concerned about getting inside someone's car without knowing where our final destination would be, but I eagerly climbed inside when he finally came to pick me up.

He was a few minutes late and didn't mention it when he pulled into the parking lot but since I'm notoriously late for just about everything, I really can't hold that against him.

Once again, he impressed me. We drove up the coast and went to a restaurant overlooking the ocean. It was a beautiful night so we sat outside, enjoyed a few glasses of wine with our meal and laughed, a lot.

We played the back and forth questions game and got to know each other a bit more. Not once was there an awkward moment in the conversation - that is until I asked about why he signed up with eharmony. There was a moment of silence before he revealed that he was looking for a partner; someone he could go home to at the end of the day and share his life with.

He asked the same question of me, and since it was only fair, I admitted that I wasn't quite sure what my goal was or is with eharmony. So far, I met a nice man who truly knows how to treat a woman and plans great date nights and I'm enjoying it. I'm not sure where this will lead or if I will meet more men to spend time with but I'm having fun, I'm making up for lost time and feeling good about myself and the man I'm getting to know. I don't really know if there's reason to think beyond that as far as the future is concerned. I've always been the type of person who lives in the moment, enjoys just being where I am and who I am with.



And I did enjoy where I was last night and who I was with. We went to a concert afterwards (I love live music) and he treated me the entire night, something I was not used to at all. We danced, laughed, touched each other innocently, but often, and when I cut the night short (I was expected home by midnight), I truly did regret having to end the date.

When he dropped me off at home, he got out of the car to walk me to the door. I embraced and thanked him for the fabulous night. I kissed him softly on the lips before saying goodnight and moments later, I fell asleep, smiling.

I thought about him as soon as I woke up, still smiling.


That was the first date that I've been on in a really, long time. In fact, he even asked me during dinner about the last date I had. Sadly, I couldn't even recall when that might have been, or with who. But what I do know is that I will remember last night's date for a long time to come and I look forward to our next.

More Dating Tips:
Dating Tips and Advice

About.com: Dating

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6 comments:

Cheryl said...

Hooray!! I found you thru Twitter and I am so happy to read this. I've been divorced for 7 years and went thru the match.com and eharmony dating thing several years ago. It was very frustrating because I knew that if it was right, I wouldn't wonder. I wouldn't have to wonder. The fact that he read the guy's dating handbook...haha..is a big kudos for him. HOW GREAT IS THAT???

I don't know you...but I'm so happy for you. If this is just a great few dates and nothing more, then it's wonderful just to know there ARE good guys out there. If it's MORE then that is FANTASTIC. As a single Mom to 5, I can honestly say that I never put dating first but I had always hoped that someone great would discover me.

I finally have that person...a long time waiting and stumbling over a few "Mr. Wrongs". It's a learning process. The first few dates were much like yours...falling asleep smiling. Now a few months later...guess what?? I'm still smiling, still waking up excited to see him and STILL feeling like a girl on a great prom date EVERY day. He's a gentleman, a great father, more handsome than anyone on this earth, funny, extremely smart, and he knows how to make my day just by saying hi.

GOOD Luck!! You'll have to let me know how it goes!
Cheryl

HIP_M0M said...

Cheryl,

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It gives single women like me hope!

I'm having a good time and enjoying my life (for the first time in years)!

Glad to "meet" you here!

Jessica said...

Glad to see that the the 3-day calling rule is still alive and well (not!).

Sounds wonderful...keep us posted!

Kevin said...

I laughed out loud when you mentioned where you guys met. i actually met my son's mother on e-harmony. You're a good writer. I'll stop by from time to time. K

bailee said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Carla said...

Great story. I love reading dating/ relationship posts on blogs. I will be back for a follow-up. ;)