Swing Set Safety

I don't have a swing set. Hell, I don't even have a yard to put one in, but when I read this email that was forwarded to me from a friend, I couldn't help but get angry. I

love going to the playground with my son. I enjoy watching him climb to new heights and explore his own strengths as he travels from side to side across the monkey bars. And even though this report is both sad and disturbing, I feel the need to share the information with other parents, because being aware is the first step in keeping our children safe.

"I lost my son three and a half years ago to a senseless backyard swing set accident. Wesley was playing on a swing set that should have been pulled from the market in the mid 1970's when the first injury was reported. Instead, swing set manufacturers (knowing the design was a risk to children) continued to market and perpetuate this design in to backyards all over the country. As a result, scores of children have had horrific injuries--and my son is dead.

I have fought my guts out--along with Wesley's mother and sister and our families--to get this design banned from the U.S. market. And we have prevailed. Never again will the design be made.


The fight was horrible. Swing set manufacturers (including the manufacturer who provided the Obama children with their new White House lawn swing set) fought us with personal attacks and campaigns that were tremendously painful--all for money.

We won. But it cost us much.

But there's another phase in the fight. A crucial phase. And I need you to join with me in helping me.

While we were successful in the ban--the truth remains that TENS OF THOUSANDS OF THE SAME TYPE OF SWING SETS that killed our Wesley still remain in backyards all over the country.

That means that children are still at risk. And the CONSUMER PRODUCTS SAFETY COMMISSION refuses to issue a nation-wide warning so that parents who have this design in their back yards can make the necessary modifications to protect their children.

THE CPSC IS DROPPING THE BALL and WE MUST DEMAND THEY DO THEIR JOB AND ISSUE AN ALERT. Even when I first called the CPSC days after Wesley's accident, I got a shove-off and a huge reluctance to even look in to this case. I simply will NOT take no for an answer. No grieving parent would or should.

Start here:
http://www.wsvn.com/features/articles/investigations/MI127331

Watch the latest tv report about this and GO VIRAL WITH IT. PLEASE--IN THE NAME OF MY BEAUTIFUL SON WESLEY--FORWARD THIS E MAIL TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW. PLEASE. GO VIRAL in e mails and on your Facebook pages. TWITTER the WSVN LINK. IT ONLY TAKES A MINUTE TO HELP. ASK EVERYONE TO CONTACT THE CPSC AND ASK THEM TO ISSUE A NATIONWIDE ALERT TO PARENTS.

WHEN YOU CONTACT THE CPSC-- GO TO: INFO@CPSC.GOV

FLOOD THEM. THEY ARE FAILING IN THIS INSTANCE. REMIND THEM THAT IN THEIR VERY OWN BI-LAWS--THEIR VERY EXISTENCE AND PURPOSE IS TO WARN THE PUBLIC. My son has been gone three and a half years. It's HIGH TIME the warning happen.

If they do not do this soon---I will hold a national press conference to say that the CPSC is dropping the ball here. Their credibility is on the line. Remind them to reclaim it.

Tainted Love

Today is Friendship Day, which takes place on the first Sunday of August each year, so I'd like to take a moment to share a story about what I've learned this last week about friendship and why - at thirtysomething - I'm just now figuring it all out.

If you're a regular to my blog, or follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you'll know that I spent last weekend in Chicago for the annual BlogHer conference. I drove out to Denver to pick up Sugar Jones and from there we hauled serious ass getting to Chicago early on the 23rd.

The hotel room at the Sheraton was under my roommate's name, but since I got to Chicago before her, I was able to check in but only by providing them with a credit card. Which. I. Do. Not. Have.

I had mentioned to my rommate, before leaving for Chicago, that I had cash to give her since the room was going to be charged to her credit card, but when I checked in, I gave them my debit card, from the checking account which had just enough money for gas and food for our trip home.

My roommate arrived once the parties were already in full swing. I had already stopped downstairs at the Social Lux party, made a new friend, tried to crash the Obama event, and was in the lobby for the Room 704 party when my roommate found me and asked for the room key. This is when I told her that I had checked in and asked her to stop by the front desk to give them her credit card.

We had different schedules throughout the weekend and, because she was pregnant and woke up with a migraine one morning, I was trying to be especially kind and stayed out of her way. I gave her the cash for my half of the room on Saturday - assuming - of course, that she had gone down to the front desk at some point over the weekend to provide them with her credit card for the room charges.

Saturday night (BowlHer) she called me and asked me if it was OK if a friend of hers spent the night in our room since they were on the same flight the following day. They had to be at the airport early and since her friend was staying at another hotel, she wanted to save money by having her stay with us so that they could avoid the extra taxi fare in the morning.

I'm too kind (or stupid), because instead of asking for money for the extra body in our room, I simply gave up my room that night. I ended up staying with my new friend and yes, perhaps was a little selfish since I spent the night away so I wouldn't be woken up by the two of them packing and getting ready to leave in the morning.

Because I didn't stay in my room, I wasn't able to charge my phone and the battery died some time in the middle of the night. When I woke up, I charged it, only to learn that my roommate had tried calling me.

This is when she informed me that the room had been charged to my card. My debit card. From the checking account that only had enough funds for gas and food for our trip home. I panicked. I called her back immediately but was only able to talk to her long enough for her to cut me off and tell me that she couldn't talk because she was going to miss her flight.

I was furious. Not only was she aware of the fact that the room was charged to my card, but she walked out of the hotel with the cash I gave her. Let's do the math here: I gave her cash for my half of the room. The entire hotel bill was charged to my card and I DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH FUNDS to cover it.

And this is when the Blind Anger kicks in because I cannot recall the details clearly after that but I do know that I tried calling her back to see if she could call the hotel and give them her credit card. She then informed me let that they couldn't charge her card without having her present to sign for it.

I asked her to send me the money via paypal and explained to her that I did not have any money to get us back home. I didn't hear back from her though because she was on her way to the airport and boarding her plane back home.

Chicago would not be the same without visiting Navy Pier but even that was difficult for me to enjoy since I wore out the battery on my phone checking my email every 10 minutes looking for the confirmation from Paypal regarding the payment that my roommate claimed was on its way.

Mamikaze was walking around Navy Pier as well so we walked and talked together, and later that night, I was able to enjoy a *very inexpensive dinner* with Sugar Jones and Shash at the World Famous Billy Goat Tavern and the two of them helped me keep my mind off of my lame-ass roommate and reminded me of how priceless it is to have great friends to laugh and chat with.

We ended up leaving late that evening, after my roommate let me know that her husband had sent payment (for the hotel room PLUS the cash I gave her) to my Paypal account. I was relieved even though I knew that it would take a few days to get the funds.

Wrong. On the road, after using my debit card to fill up the Equiox with gas, I discovered that she had sent the payment as an eCheck, which of course takes 3-5 days to clear. I already have an anxiety disorder, so this just kicked it into high gear as I literally had to put it out of my mind and concentrated on the ride home.

Sugar Jones was a little annoyed that I was in such a foul mood, so we drove and drove, sleeping in the car that night just outside St. Louis since we no longer had funds to spend on a motel room.

We straight through the following day, stopping only for gas and enjoying coffee and Rockstar energy drinks which, as scary as it sounds, prevented us from eating as often (and therefore saving us money).

We picked up Sugar's kids outside of Albuquerque the following night and I cried myself to sleep, missing my son who I was away from for a total of 9 days and for the mistakes, misunderstandings and missteps I took in regards to the money and hotel room.

The eCheck from Paypal cleared on Friday, July 30th. I got the email saying that the funds were now available in my Paypal account, but it still takes another 2 - 4 days to transfer the funds into my checking account. As of this post, the funds are still not in my account. (Trust me, I've been monitoring my account several times a day since last Sunday.)

My son and I have been trying to enjoy the last five days together, but I admit the situation has caused me to be a bit more impatient and irritable, bringing me to tears on several occasions and unfortunately, my son even heard me yelling - and swearing - when my roommate called to try and "work things out."

What I've learned through everything that has happened since arriving in Chicago, and may be something that only those who attended BlogHer can truly understand, is that friends are not simply those that show up for your birthday party or who send you pictures of their families during the holidays.

Friends that I have made online have truly been the most genuine, giving and sincere people that I could hope to know. I had the pleasure of meeting many of them in person last week and there were several people I met last week that I look forward to connecting with online and hopefully again in person at future conferences.

Today is Friendship Day and if you've read this far, you'll understand why I need to say thank you. Thank you for supporting me, listening to my side of the story, backing me up and for offering to send me money during this rough time. I truly could not ask for anything more.

Oh, and one more thing: My anxiety disorder does cause me to deal with things in unusual ways, so my roommate was right. It does totally suck that I got charged overdraft fees each and every time we stopped for gas or ate on the 2,000 mile trip home. And I too am truly sorry that this has occurred.

Mamavation

It's been an amazing ride so far, participating in so many online networks that have led me to some pretty fabulous people. I'm heading to BlogHer this week to meet many of these individuals in real life for the first time, but before I get there, I wanted to stop and talk about one woman who truly has inspired me.

Ali (@PickleSugarPlum) of The Rehan Family, is hoping to be voted in as the first Mamavation Mom and I'm encouraging you all to vote for her as well.

Now, you may know one of the other moms in the running for this and I know they're all equally worthy and as inspiring, but since I know Ali, I wanted to show my support by sharing with her how she's already motivated me, with or without the official title.

I met Ali at the Mom's Nite Out event here in San Diego back in May and have since seen her at Tweetups. I met her husband, learned about her desire to start her own business and have laughed with her over dinner. Nothing about our conversations ever led me to believe that she was uncomfortable with her weight or that it had started to affect her self-esteem.

Many of us use humor to cover up our insecurities. I'm guilty of this, for sure. Growing up, I never had an issue with my weight. I had a healthy pregnancy and was able to lose the weight afterward, but it's been only recently (after my divorce) that I started putting on a few pounds here and there. I've gotten used to asking for larger sizes in the dressing room but that doesn't mean that I'm comfortable with my weight. I make jokes about it and even though I'm constantly swearing at the bathroom scale, no one around me would ever know that my weight was an issue.

I don't want to go into the whole body image thing and how media continues to remind us (and young viewers absorbing it all) that we could all stand to lose a few pounds or change the color of our hair or get those teeth whitened. It's all around us. Every day, the "need" to improve ourselves, physically.

Ali is very brave and I extend to her the biggest congratulations on putting herself out there. You'll see what I mean when you watch her VLOG entry. Voting for the first Mamavation Mom ends soon so head on over and cast your vote. The winner will be announced on July 31st.

Mamavation is a social experiment and weight loss campaign on twitter, created by Bookieboo, an online support group for moms trying to lose weight.

Thelma & Louise - Part 2

Our Chevy vehicle will be delivered next Monday. They promised me it would be dropped off to me between 11 am - 1 pm. I hope it's not like when the Cable Guy promises to be there within a certain time frame. They're notoriously late and even though I'm driving on my own, I do like to have a schedule to follow. (Those of you who know me are laughing right now because I am notoriously late.)

Sugar Jones is relying on me to pick her up in Denver on Tuesday so I'll have to haul butt to get there before the day is over. We're going to spend the night downtown (Is there anything going on in downtown Denver on a Tuesday night?) and our plan is to be in Chicago by the night of the 22nd or early morning on the 23rd. That is if we don't get arrested for disorderly conduct or disturbing the peace along the way. Have you read those weird state laws in Iowa?

Feel free to follow along via the BlogHer website, our own personal blogs (Happy Healthy Hip Parenting and Sugar in the Raw). We'll also be updating the Twitter feed along with our own (@sugarjones, @hip_m0m) and Whrrl along the way!

According to Google maps, it's a 2,062 mile drive, which should take us approximately 30 hours total. We plan on driving 15 hours per day so here's our estimated route:

Monday, July 20th
Depart San Diego, CA
(overnight in Las, Vegas)

Tuesday, July 21st
Stop in Denver, CO

Wednesday, July 22nd
Arrive in Chicago, IL

For those of you who live along the route, help us out! Let us know where we should stop for food, restroom breaks or if we can come over for a home-cooked meal!

To check out the other carpools heading to Chicago, follow the Interactive Map to see where the Seattle group is or The Blogrollers from Atlanta!

Happy Mother's Day to Me

Yesterday was Mother's Day. I woke up (a bit hungover) to my son staring at me and asking me to play first thing in the morning. One of the first things I typically do when I get up, regardless of what day it is, is visit my Twitter account and Facebook to see what's been going on. I was surprised to see so many congratulatory notes and assumed people were congratulating me on my Front Page feature in the San Diego Union Tribune. But wait, how would people outside of San Diego know about that?

It wasn't until I saw the tweet from Totally_Toni of Just Stop Screaming, that I realized that my blog (yep, the one that you're reading right now) was listed in the Top 50 Power Moms list published by Nielsen! So, what exactly does this mean?

It means that the audience is listening, or reading to be exact. They're commenting, sharing links and passing along valuable information and resources that are shared on my site and those of the other moms on this list.

I couldn't be more honored to be listed with such influential and successful mommy bloggers. These are the women who I look forward to meeting in person at the upcoming BlogHer convention in Chicago.

Happy Healthy Hip Parenting was mentioned - or appeared - elsewhere over the last few days. Thanks to Keep It Classy Jen and Sugar Jones for putting together this awesome Mother's Day video:






Mammarazi Knows Best and San Diego Momma did a lovely re-cap of the San Diego Mom's Nite Out event that took place last Thursday night. If you're a San Diego mom or dad, you'll definitely want to join us on Thursday, May 21st for the 2nd Annual Happy Healthy Hip Parenting Party. It takes place at The Airport Lounge and each guest will receive a FREE drink ticket, half-price appetizers and be eligible for some GREAT giveaways provided by our many sponsors. I hope to see you there!

Mamapedia - Get your parenting advice here

It's 2:00 a.m. and your three month old is crying...a lot. You're a first time mother, and while you've got a ton of questions, you called your mom at 2:00 in the morning last night about that crazy looking diaper, so you'd really like to get through this one on your own.

But where can you turn?

Mamapedia is a new site that takes the wisdom of thousands and thousands of moms and makes is searchable! You can head to the computer with that screaming infant in your arms and type,

"Why does my baby cry so much at night?"

And this is what you'll find - an article about a mom who asked a question titled "Sleepless Nights with a 13 week old" and the responses of forty-four moms. You can read those forty-four answers while bouncing your baby, and with a little luck by the time you are through your infant will be fast asleep and you will feel better as well.

To launch this new mom resource, the Momfluence network and Resourceful Mommy are throwing a party. Join us on Twitter this Friday, May 8th, from 9:00 to 10:00 p.m. eastern time along with mom experts in a variety of parenting areas: multiples, kid crafting, health and safety, potty training, home schooling and more!

During the party, details about a "What Can I Learn Today?" contest will be revealed...along with the incredible grand prize.

Join us by RSVP'ing here!

This event brought to you by Momfluence: rocking the cradle and shaping the world.

There are no words...

...to describe how broken my heart is right now. I'm in tears, praying for a family whom I have never met in real life. I heard the news through Twitter and realized how quickly, and helpful, this service can be when there is news that needs to be spread.

A beautiful toddler lost her life today and her family (and loved ones near and far) are mourning the death of someone too young and too precious to say goodbye to so soon.

Madeline Alice Spohr
November 11, 2007 - April 7, 2009

Words just cannot explain how devastating it was to find out that L.A. based mom and dad Heather and Mike, lost their daughter Madeline today. Although Heather wrote about her daughter needing to go to the hospital just yesterday, there's nothing that could've ever prepare her (or any parent) for the death of their child.

If you are able to be Los Angeles on Saturday, April 25th, please join the walk for the March of Dimes or donate in Madeline's name if you cannot be there and please spread the word through your blog, website or on your Facebook, Twitter or other networking pages.

R.I.P. dear Madeline

National Poetry Month

April is National Poetry Month and it's just around the corner! My good blogger friend, Greg Pincus, over at Gotta Book, has put together a wonderful schedule of events to celebrate this annual event and month-long celebration.

In his own words, here's what he'll be showcasing on his blog throughout the month of April:

I'm incredibly excited to announce the first annual 30 Poets/30 Days, a celebration of children's poetry taking place at GottaBook during National Poetry Month.


Every day in April, I'll be posting a previously unpublished poem by a different poet. Here's the alphabetical list of who's participating:

Arnold Adoff, Jaime Adoff, Rebecca Kai Dotlich, Douglas Florian, Betsy Franco, Kristine O'Connell George, Charles Ghigna, Nikki Giovanni, Joan Bransfield Graham, Nikki Grimes, Mary Ann Hoberman, Lee Bennett Hopkins, X. J. Kennedy, Julie Larios, J. Patrick Lewis, Pat Mora, Kenn Nesbitt, Linda Sue Park, Ann Whitford Paul, Gregory K. Pincus, Jack Prelutsky, Adam Rex, Jon Scieszka, Joyce Sidman, Marilyn Singer, April Halprin Wayland, Janet Wong, and Jane Yolen.

We'll launch on Tuesday, April 1, with former Children's Poet Laureate Jack Prelutsky's “A Little Poem for Poetry Month.” We’ll end April 30th with “Books & Me” by Pat Mora to help celebrate El día de los niños/El día de los libros (Children's Day/Book Day). And every day in between will bring something new. You can follow along here and via @30poets30days on Twitter.

There will also be a lot of other poetry related fun going on in the kidlitosphere during April, including

- at the Miss Rumphius Effect, Tricia has a cool series called Poetry Makers, with a highlight being interviews with 36 (!!!) poets.
- at Poetry For Children, Sylvia Vardell will be reviewing a new children's poetry book every day;
- at the Pencil Talk blog, Anastasia Suen will be collecting school poems written by children throughout April... and posting one each day.
- and of course there's Poetry Friday and much, much more, so look for updates all month long.

I want to thank all the poets for their generosity and enthusiasm, and I particularly want to single out J. Patrick Lewis and Kenn Nesbitt for going above and beyond the call in helping me put this event together. Also, special thanks to my brother Jon and all the folks who’ve given me ideas and support along the way. If there has been any frustration in organizing this event at all, it's only that there are so many other wonderfully talented people writing poetry for kids and it was hard not to invite them all. But that's why I plan to make this an annual celebration.

Six Figure Moms Club

I attended a great networking event last night hosted by @aaswartz of Square Martini Media. There were over a dozen women there and I did not have the opportunity to speak with all of the women but I did meet several great people and even ran into someone I hadn't seen in a while.

We created vision boards, which I had never done before and we ate some yummy food provided by dining details and shared some laughs, discussed our children, our businesses and where we picture ourselves in the next year.

Many of the people there spoke about Facebook and Twitter including @alanunderkofler, @VPG_Printing, @missorganized, @EtsukoT, @searchguru and @katzni.

My vision board contains many interesting photos and words found in random magazines that spilled across the tables tonight. Themes that showed up on my board included family, love & romance, travel and of course, success and financial freedom.

If you haven't created a vision board for yourself, your business, or your family, check out the vision boards that people have posted online. You'll see it's as easy as putting down on paper, or in writing, what you see for your future.

What Makes Jeff a Happy Healthy Hip Parent

I met Jeff Tincher through Twitter, when I commented - sarcastically - to one of his tweets.

Jeff writes over at Daddy's Toolbox when he's not working (at home, or at the office). During the day, he is a developor and consultant for Springhouse, a computer training and consulting company, located in Exton, Pennsylvania.

Jeff has two great children. His son Logan is 4 and daughter, Kaleigh, is 2.

I asked Jeff several questions about his role as a parent and he shared several stories about his relationship with his children.

1) What makes you happy, as a parent?

I like watching my son get excited when I tell him he has done a good job or like the other day when I told him that I took his drawings and the paper that he wrote the alphabet on to my work. I told him I had my friends (coworkers) use it to help them spell! He was so excited. As for my daughter, she and I have the Father/Daughter bond going. We rub noses at night - that is our thing!

2) What is your proudest parenting moment?

I've had a few proud parenting moments so far in my children's 4 and 2 years of life. There are things that I can't believe our son knows how to do, so that makes me very proud. Like the other day he was writing all of this alphabet, his name and some other things. He's really good with that! He then was drawing pumpkins. I watched him draw a perfect pumpkin, down to the 2 triangle eyes, nose and mouth! I was shocked.

3) What is your biggest parenting challenge?

Dealing with whining. I immediately go insane at the first whine. :-)

4) What’s your favorite family-friendly restaurant?

We like Red Robin in Exton, PA. Oh EXCEPT when the "BIRD" is there. It scares my kids!

5) What advice would you give to new or expecting parents?

Sometimes you just have to "give in" or else it's a battle with your kids. Like right now, I'm listening to my wife put our four-year-old to bed. He is fussing and screaming that it is NOT a school night. Well, it's Monday night so, "Yes it is!" I would have caved in by now and given in. My wife is more stubborn and is up there trying to make him understand.

6) Who or where do you go to for parenting advice?

I mainly ask our other friends with kids. I've set up a group on Facebook for the parents of kids that go to our daycare. It's starting to help. We are building a support network.

I think it's a fabulous idea to start an online support group of parents that you know. Playdates and playgroups were first created for this same reason, but it's great to have a place to go 24 hours a day to ask questions and chat with other adults after the kids are asleep - or during nap time.

What makes you a happy, healthy, hip parent?

Giving Thanks

This year, I'm grateful for:

My son - He's nearly five and he is becoming such a mature young man. He makes me laugh on a regular basis and inspires me to be the best mom I can possibly be. I'm so proud of him and all he's learning and accomplishing.

My son's teachers - There are many teachers who work with my son on a weekly basis. From the two teachers in his classroom, to the Spanish, Art, Music, PE and Enrichment classes, these amazing educators put so much time and energy into each and every child that they teach.

My parents - My mom and dad are always there for me when I need them. They've flown out to San Diego so many times since my son was born that I couldn't possibly pay them back for all the miles and airport adventures they've experienced on our behalf. They're flying out again in mid-December and I couldn't be more thrilled to have them here for both Christmas and my son's 5th birthday.

My sister - She's put up with me for years and still manages to listen, offer advice and know me better than anyone ever could. She's a great mom, a super-cool aunt, a wonderful friend, fabulous wife, and an amazing massage therapist!

My ex-husband - He's put up with my moods and listened to my opinions whether he's agreed with me or not (mostly not). He's always there for our son and helps me out when I truly need it. He's a fantastic father and I love seeing my son's face light up when he gets dropped off at his dad's house or when he gets picked up from mine.

My co-workers - These are the women I see on a daily basis. They've seen me through a wedding, pregnancy and supported me through my divorce. They have truly become great friends and mentors who have guided me in my career and helped me in "real" life.

My colleagues - For providing emotional support, offering suggestions and allowing me to do the same.

My clients - For trusting me with their parenting issues and allowing me to work closely with their families and recommending me to other moms and dads.

My readers - I'm truly grateful for my readers, who loyally visit the sites I write at (here, Intent, and the Examiner) and leave comments, provide great feedback and share my site with others.

My friends - For those who follow me on Twitter, Facebook, or who know me in the offline world, I could not have gotten through the last few years without them, especially those who listened to me bitch, complain and allowed me to share my random thoughts at wee hours in the morning.

What and who are you thankful for this year? If you have a blog, add yours to the I am Thankful Meme, hosted by Mommy Community.

What Makes Amy a Happy Healthy Hip Parent

I met Amy through our connection on both Twitter and Facebook. She joined the Happy Healthy Hip Parenting group and introduced me to two great sites that she is a part of. She is a blogger at ParentSphere and works behind the scenes for Great Au Pair.

Amy is mom to three-year-old Hailey. She was kind enough to take some time to answer some questions about her experience as a parent and offers some great advice for expecting parents.

1) What makes you happy, as a parent?

Oh my, so many things! I look at the world so differently now. I notice my surroundings more because I see them through my daughter’s eyes. I mostly love having someone to teach. It’s a fantastic feeling knowing that she’s learning something new each day and I play a big part of that.

2) What’s the healthiest thing about your relationship with your child?

We are very open with each other. Granted, she’s only three, but we communicate with each other very well. I hope we can keep the lines of communication open for a long, long time.

3) Kids say the cutest things. What is the funniest story you recall about your daughter?

I probably Tweet something new and cute she says everyday! One of the funniest things I always tell people is when she was just under two years old and she needed a diaper change. I told her it was time for the diaper change and she patted her butt, looked up at me and matter-of-factly said, “Nope, stays in my diapee.” That was the first time she really started showing attitude.

4) What is your proudest parenting moment?

Tough question. I have many “proud” parenting moments, hard to pick out just one. I feel very proud when we’re out and she uses her manners. I always feel good about that. She’s very polite and that is important to me.

5) What is your biggest parenting challenge?

Picking my battles and being consistent. I want to maintain openness with her throughout the years, especially when she’s school-aged. My goal is to have her always feel comfortable confiding in me, no matter what.

6) What’s your favorite family-friendly restaurant?

Oh, we LOVE dining out. I suppose my absolute favorite is Red Robin in Plainfield, IL. We go there a lot. My daughter gets her balloons, the food is good and we always have a fun time.

7) What’s your favorite activity you enjoy with Hailey?

Just being out and about. I love taking her to the zoo, museums and to the park.

8) What advice would you give to new or expecting parents?

Be prepared to be totally unprepared! Each day, each stage is something different. Embrace it. I never believed it would go as fast as it has but here I am, with a three-year-old already and I was once wishing the baby stages away! Soak it all in, ladies.

9) Who or where do you go to for parenting advice?

I generally consult friends in online communities like Twitter and The Motherhood. Chatting with friends over the phone and running this or that by them. My mom. Of course I still go to her too.

10) How would your daughter describe you?

She’s still unbiased. Though, I’m pretty sure if you asked her, she would tell you that I’m the coolest thing since sliced bread.

What Makes Laurel a Happy Healthy Hip Parent

I first connected with Laurel Snyder through Twitter, a social networking site that is both addicting and inspiring. It provides marketers and bloggers with great resources and countless contacts. I'm friends with her on Facebook and follow kidlit bloggers closely, which is how I first discovered her.

Getting to know someone is easy to do when they have children. Simply mention their role as a parent and you'll start to hear stories that tell you everything you need to know about the way they behave, behind closed doors. Laurel is a happy, healthy, hip mom and without meeting her in person, or her children, I can say that based on the answers she provided.

You may know Laurel from the books she's authored: Up and Down the Scratchy Mountains, Inside the Slidy Diner, The Myth of the Single Machines, Half Life, and Daphne and Jim. You can find Laurel's books at your favorite independent bookstore. She's currently working on her second novel.

It's my opinion (and that of most others I know) that all parents are working parents. Laurel does, however, earn a paycheck from her writing, although she admits that the bulk of her income goes to child care. Here's what else Laurel had to say, in her own words:

I write books for kids, and thank my lucky stars I'm able to publish them. It's a blast! Not only do I get to think and dream and get paid, but I also get to do events for children, and bring my kids along!

How many children do you have?

Two, both boys. Mose is 3 and Lewis is about one and half. They're wild men.



What makes you happy, as a parent (besides when your kids finally fall asleep)?

Oh, man. So many things make me happy. But most of all I'm happy when I see them having fun with each other. In the bath or the yard, digging with sticks, or sitting on the couch looking at books, or building a fort with pillows. didn't expect they'd be ready to play together this early, and it is really amazing. Sometimes in the car the older one will start laughing for no reason, and Lew will imitate him and they'll just cackle.

What's the healthiest thing about your relationship with your children?

I'm a believer that the most important thing is that I not be resentful or stressed, so I cut a lot of corners (baths, meals, etc). At least at this point, that feels hugely functional in our house. I'm not ashamed (or secretive about) Cheerios for dinner, or them sleeping in the buff, or sometimes turning on the TV for an hour before preschool, so I can have coffee and listen to NPR. I feel good, and so they feel good. They're VERY relaxed kids.

Kids say the cutest things. What is the funniest story you recall about each of your children?

Oh, recently Mose adopted this imaginary friend named "Little ghost". And one day we were driving in Virginia, and he freaked out and was like, "We left Little Ghost!" So I asked him where we'd left him. And he pointed out the window, to where we just happened to be passing an awesome pumpkin patch full of scarecrows and dogs and all sorts of fun stuff. Convenient, eh? We stopped, and ended up with a ton of cookies and cider. Oy.

Lew isn't very verbal yet, so everything he does is adorable, but it's very hard to describe. I love when he "talks" on the phone. And the minute we get in the car he sings and sings until we stop.

What is your proudest parenting moment?

Is it weird that I can't think of one? I don't really think of it in moments. As a stay-at-home mom, my life feels like a giant wave of routine, but I love it. Maybe that I have driven 12 hours (ATL to Baltimore) and back, by myself, three times, with both kids. I feel like it's something to be proud of that I have two boys under three who can sit and talk and sing and sleep and manage a drive like that together.

What is your biggest parenting challenge?

Balance. Isn't that true for everyone? Finding the moment BEFORE the moment where I get frustrated. Setting aside time for myself, but not skimping on the kids. Being a good mom and also a good woman. And remembering that sometimes you can't do it ALL and you have to ask for help or call it a day.

What's your favorite family-friendly restaurant?

Dakota Blue, in Atlanta. They have baskets full of toys and are just grubby enough. But not too gross. I also love to go to Holy Taco. The only Mexican place I know with brisket tacos, amazing margaritas AND chicken nuggets (or as Mose says, "tikken donuts").

What's your favorite activity you enjoy with your children?

When my husband is home and we're all here together on a Sunday morning, and we read the Times and drink coffee and the boys make a mess with art supplies and we eat sausages and raisin toast off paper plates in the living room. Usually there's some TV involved and nobody showers. It doesn't happen often enough.

What advice would you give to new or expecting parents?

Do all you can to relax. I'm really worried for the Purell mommies who spend all their time researching toxins online and fretting over babysitter reccommendations. I understand the impulse, the desire to keep your kids safe. But you can't protect them from everything, and the end result is often, I fear, messed up kids.

Who or where do you go to for parenting advice?

My mom. My friends. But most of all my gut. I believe in having a pediatrician I trust and leaving medical questions in her hands. After Lew was born I tossed out the books (except the AAP, for 911 moments) and swore to stop the Google searches. We all have instincts and the books tend to get in the way. Online medical and parenting advice is like the "monkeys with typewriters" phenomenon. For every concern, some crazy person online will have guessed correctly, simply because there are 8 trillion crazies online. But you can't spend your life cutting out every food that turns up in a "study." I believe in moderation.

How would your children describe you?

Mose says I'm a goofball.

To learn more about this goofball mom and author, visit her site or those of her publishers: Laurel Snyder
Random House
Ten Speed Press

Community Members

I celebrated the one year anniversary of this blog not that long ago and I'm amazed at how quickly things have evolved for me and how many wonderful people I have met along over the last twelve months.

People often ask me how I find the time to write and how I find the content to include. I read articles about parenting, blog posts about children, and I receive newsletters that inspire me as well as discovering people through our connections on line, whether it be through LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, MySpace or from reading the comments left on the blogs that I read and simply clicking through and making new friends in the process.

There are several people I have met that I'd like to introduce my community members to. One, in particular, is a woman named Cathy Northcutt who I spent yesterday afternoon with. She's a wonderful example of Passionate Parenting and has inspired me to take my company in new directions and I applaud her efforts of using her experience as a Life Coach and mother of two to inspire others to explore their opportunities through insight and support.

Cathy and I met through our connection with the RCB Team of Certified Parent Educators here in San Diego. She too, taught at the RCB conference and sat in on my class about The Birds & the Bees.

She does many wonderful things which I will highlight in future posts, such as her journal entitled Who Am I? (which I'll be reviewing soon), but the one thing I can't wait to share is her weekly Telegathering which is held every Tuesday night.

Join in the Passionate Parent Coaching Call which is free (other than the long-distance phone call to dial in). During the first half of the sixty-minute session, Cathy will discuss a specific parenting issue, such as teaching self-control, handling sibling rivalry, or balancing work & family. The second half of the session will be open for questions.

I plan on being there this, and every, Tuesday night so I encourage you to visit Cathy's website, learn more about her, whether or not you're ready for a Life Coach, or get to know yourself better by answering the questions she provides.

Be sure to RSVP for the Tuesday night Coaching Call and please let Cathy know that you heard about her here. Once you confirm that you'll be calling in, she'll provide you with the phone number and access code. I'll see you on the call Tuesday, October 7th at 8:30pm (PST).

To learn more about her services and retreats by visiting her site:
www.CathyNorthcutt.com

11 Step Program for Parents-to-Be

I have been discovering many great Moms who Twitter since joining this amazing group of women a few weeks back. Just yesterday, I found this hilarious post from Real Tech Mom and just had to share. Check out her blog and the 11 Step Program for to Complete Before Having Kids.

For many of us, we've found out - through hands on learning - what it truly is like to be a parent. As funny - and true - as this list is, I don't think anyone is ever really prepared for the changes and challenges that becoming a parent brings.

I teach one hour parenting workshops and a 15-hour course on Redirecting Children's Behavior and am amazed at all of the new and expecting parents who are eager to gain some tools and techniques to use with their children when the time comes.

Classes are scheduled in La Mesa at Java Mama and I'm pleased to announce that there will be additional workshops held in North County as well, at the Babies in Bloom boutique on the border of Oceanside and Vista.

Check out the class schedule or calendar of events for more information. I am also able to cater courses and workshops for your mom's group, PTA or at your place of employment. Contact me to set up a customized program that fits your needs and schedule.

Newly Designed Website

I am so excited to announce that my website has a fresh look. Thanks to @mikeward of Mike Ward Design, my Happy Healthy Hip Parenting site is finally, truly hip!

Coming soon - the same fresh look at a new and improved blog site. There's always room for improvement so if there are any suggestions that you may have regarding the website or this blog, please let me know.

The Other Woman

There are two types of women in the following scenario. Those who have been cheated on by a man and those who are the other woman. I have little respect for both of them if they are aware of the man's behavior. Continuing a relationship based on lies and deceit is not healthy. I encourage any woman who is involved with a cheating man to move on. She deserves the chance to find a true relationship built on honesty, devotion and mutual values.

I follow Lena Chen at many of the social sites she is a part of. I first learned about her through Twitter and immediately grew fond of her graphically detailed, and honest commentary about her sex life over at her blog Sex & the Ivy. As a Harvard graduate, Chen is educated and well aware of the reputation she has built for herself. What I admire most about her is her openness and her ability to express herself without concern as to who she may offend with her language or the details that she shares.

I was pleased to also discover her at The Frisky, one of my favorite sex blogs. The other day she wrote about her experience as the other woman and how she went about revealing her relationships to the women that were committed to the man involved.

While I don't always agree with her or relate to many of her experiences, I do think that what she has to say in this particular article serves to empower women everywhere to raise the standards that they expect from the men in their lives.

The Women, is a new movie produced by Mick Jagger and Diane English, who also directs the women-only cast. Diane is also the screenwriter of this story of Mary Haines, a woman who is forced to deal with the wide range of emotions experienced from the most ultimate betrayal: that of her cheating husband followed by an even more astounding deception from her close, female friend.

Without a single man in this all-star cast, The Women is bound to be the ultimate chick flick. Betrayal of any kind is a powerful thing and changes a person's life one way or the other. Having women in my life that I rely on to keep my most intimate secrets and desires, I would have to argue that being betrayed by one of them would kill me in a more devastating way than a cheating man ever could.

Featuring Meg Ryan, Eva Mendes, Jada Pinkett Smith, Annette Bening, Bette Midler, Cloris Leachman and Debra Messing, the gossip and buzz surrounding this dramedy should be enough incentive for women everywhere to be the first ones to see it for themselves.

One Year Blogoversary!

An entire year has gone by since I first started this blog. It's evolved quite a bit in these twelve months, as have I, and I thank each and every one of you for taking time out of your day to stop here, visit and perhaps leave a comment.

Comments are what keeps us bloggers going so even if it's to disagree or to ask a quick question, I truly appreciate what readers have to say.

In honor of the one year anniversary of the blog and my company, Happy Healthy Hip Parenting, I will be hosting several giveaways and contests over the next week. Great prizes were donated from some amazing companies that I discovered at the ABC Kids Expo last week in Las Vegas.

If you'd like to learn more about the upcoming baby gear giveaways, you can subscribe to the blog via email, RSS Feed or text messaging!

You won't want to miss out on your chance to win so be sure to stop by every day next week.

And, by the end of this month, a newly designed website will roll out over at the Happy Healthy Hip Parenting company site. I'll launch the new design over here, so keep your eyes peeled for the wonderful graphics created by Mike Ward, friend and colleague whom I met over at Twitter.

There are many wonderful people I've met on line over the last year, so again, thanks to everyone for your support and interest.

10 Things Men Wish Women Would Know

I have been shopping around (so to speak) for relationship advice lately as many people I know have been coming to me (for who knows what reason) to ask me for my thoughts and insight on marriage and the future of love and intimacy as I know it.

Alright, so my suggestions usually fall along the lines of, "Here's What NOT To Do," based on my personal experience with a failed marriage and several failed relationships before and afterwards.

Facebook, Twitter and other social networking sites have introduced me to may blog, including the lylah blog. Even though this post is from last year, there are relevant ideas here for any relationship (not just marriage). 

I need to preface this by saying that I am not a religious person. Even though I grew up Catholic and spent the majority of my education at Catholic schools, I don't pray or attend church (unless there's a wedding, baptism or funeral to attend) but I do consider myself a spiritual person.

The reason why I bring this up is that I want to tell you about my experience with the Bible. I read many stories from the Bible growing up and got many things from it. I believe that there are many great lessons to be learned within the pages, whether or not one believes in the stories from a faith point-of-view or, as in my experience, if you enjoy quotes and the power of language.

Let's face it. The Bible is well-written and well-edited. With my publishing background and love of literature, I look at the Bible much differently as an adult. There are passages and stories written by different people in this collection, and you would be hard-pressed to find one that is not a good storyteller.

I'm getting off track here. What I do want to say though, before I continue with the point of this post, is that I read the Bible as I would any other book. I read between the lines, I disregard some parts of it while re-read others.

The biblical quotes that are included in this list from the lylah blog are powerful and relevant to the message she's trying to communicate. I encourage you to create your own list (with your partner) to be sure to have a better understanding of his or her needs.

Finally, the list:

   10 Things Men Want Women to Take to Heart:

1. Don't Try to Change Me
2. Respect Me
3. Understand
4. Pray for Me
5. See Me as God Sees Me
6. Let Me Be Me
7. Let me OWN the Responsibility
8. Feed Me (I take this to mean both physically and spiritually)
9. Build Me Up
10. Express Your Discontent & Disappointment in Me Without Anger

I would be curious to know what men would want their wives to know and vice versa, that are not included in this list. I encourage you to add them in the comments below.

You're Invited to a Blogger Dinner Party!

The wise woman who blogs over at Barking Mad has come up with an amazing idea that she's shared with the blogosphere. Actually, I learned about the event from following her on Twitter.

In order to participate, I must invite ten bloggers to a virtual dinner party that I will host. The rules are simple. I can invite only ten but any ten bloggers.

The ten bloggers I would like to invite are:

1. The Bloggess - Because she is truly the funniest fucking writer I know - or wish I knew - or "know" on line.
2. Guy Kawasaki - Because the first time I met him I didn't get to ask him all the questions I would've liked to and plus, he is the manliest "guy" I know that still looks good in a pink hat and feathered boa.
3. Lena Chen - Because she doesn't give a shit and we'd have a great deal to talk about...besides sex. Maybe.
4. Mignon Fogarty - Because she's helping change the face of publishing having just authored a book inspired by her blog, Grammar Girl.
5. Pete Cashmore - Because he's from Mashable and because I need to determine if he's as hot in person as he appears in his profile pic.
   
6. No Minivan - Because like her, I'm a thirtysomething mom who is also a redhead (although mine is natural) and I also have a son (she has two boys). Unlike her, I grew up in the midwest and moved to SoCal and I LOVE my minivan.
7. Rebecca Woolf - Like Mignon Fogarty, she went from blog to book with her Girl Gone Child memoir.
8. Dana (aka Mamalogues) - Because she's the *bravest* blogger that I know of.
9. Busy Dad - Because he has truly changed Friday & Saturday Nights with the creation of Weekend Blog Hoppers
10. David - Because his blog, Dad's House, has truly changed the focus of my own.

This was not an easy list to compile but I'm thinking that the above company would truly make for a fabulous gathering of talented, humorous and interesting people who would inspire much laughter, arguments and perhaps tears - all for which would make an amazing blog post (or two).