Urgent Care (or the Tale of the Missing Condom)

Even though I was at BlogHer this year and attended several seminars and sat in on a few panels, I was not present for the reading of Knotty Yarn's Stuck in the Middle with You. Danielle read the entire blog post during her keynote speech and I am kind of glad I wasn't there cause I would've probably pissed myself from laughing so hard and then I'd end up telling everyone around me about the time that I had to go to Urgent Care for a similar situation (you know, to distract them from the fact that I had wet myself).

Oh hell, it's an awesome story and one that I can't believe has not been shared yet. So here goes:

It was the first time I had sex with this particular individual and it had been a long time for me (dry spell). I was incredibly turned on and it was completely-spontaneous-in-the-middle-of-the-afternoon type sex and everything was going well - until it was over.

After sex, I typically lay there in the afterglow and enjoy the sensation of being naked and not having a care in the world (as opposed to being naked in front of the mirror) but this time, that moment of calm was interrupted by what he said.

"I think the condom slipped off." He said it so casually that it took me a second to register what he was trying to say. Once I did, I could hardly relax. My first thought went to what day of the month it was, quickly followed by: Was I ovulating? Was the pill 99% effective with or without a condom? I couldn't remember and I was panicking and not even thinking about the sex anymore or how good it wasn't. All I could think about was, Could I be pregnant already?

As I stood up and looked at him (standing in front of me, naked, and with an odd expression on his face), I realized that he was more freaked out than I was. I started to get dressed and was thinking about the Morning After Pill and what I would have to do in order to get a hold of one, when I noticed that he was tearing the sheets off the bed. And that's when I realized that what he really meant to say was, "The condom is missing."

We both started to look under the bed and tossed aside the clothes that lay on the floor around us. "Where is it?" I said. "It's gotta be around here somewhere," he responded.

It was nowhere to be found. The only logical place it could possibly be was inside. Me.

I went to the bathroom to try and fish it out (seriously, Danielle, I feel your pain here). By the time I finally gave up on the search, my female bits were sore and I was seriously not in the mood to even face my new partner.

I was pissed. In fact, my partner would say (if we were still speaking), that he wanted to leave at that moment because I was acting like such a bitch. I was embarrassed, annoyed and freaked out (still thinking about the possibility of conception).

We went to bed that night with our backs to each other. I was not going to let him touch me again. After all, imagine what else could happen down there? I was seriously behaving like a child, blaming him for 'losing' the condom instead of laughing about such a crazy situation (which I laughed about the next day).

I went to Urgent Care the next morning although I made sure to call ahead. See, I've been there before and I know about that little window in the tiny waiting room that you're required to speak through when you check in. The receptionist asks you what you're there for and I was prepared to not have to explain it to her and the handful of strangers sitting there.

Over the phone, I told her why I was coming in. "I had sex last night and the condom disappeared. I think it's stuck inside me." I made sure to explain that I would not be able to say that out loud when I got there. I think she was laughing at me when she hung up the phone.

When I arrived, the woman behind the desk asked me what I was there for (I swear, she should've recognized my embarrassment), so I said, "I'm the one who just called. About the situation. You know. That I can't say." She nodded (fighting back a laugh) and said, "A nurse practitioner will be with you shortly." I sat down and everyone in the waiting room stared, wondering what I was there for and why it was too scary to say out loud and should they be sitting so close to me?

Apparently, getting a condom (or anything else) stuck inside you is sort of a big deal, cause I was called back pretty much right away and as I stood up, everyone in the room looked up at me, either thinking that they were glad they didn't have what I had or jealous because they still had to wait for their emergency care.

Once I was with the practitioner, I was much less concerned about an unplanned pregnancy and was sort of intrigued when she started telling me about "other" things that "people'' have gotten stuck inside them (notice how she didn't say 'women' or 'vagina'). My imagination was on overdrive as she removed the condom and provided it to me as evidence (I asked to see it) so I could relax and return to my regular scheduled program.

Tainted Love

Today is Friendship Day, which takes place on the first Sunday of August each year, so I'd like to take a moment to share a story about what I've learned this last week about friendship and why - at thirtysomething - I'm just now figuring it all out.

If you're a regular to my blog, or follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you'll know that I spent last weekend in Chicago for the annual BlogHer conference. I drove out to Denver to pick up Sugar Jones and from there we hauled serious ass getting to Chicago early on the 23rd.

The hotel room at the Sheraton was under my roommate's name, but since I got to Chicago before her, I was able to check in but only by providing them with a credit card. Which. I. Do. Not. Have.

I had mentioned to my rommate, before leaving for Chicago, that I had cash to give her since the room was going to be charged to her credit card, but when I checked in, I gave them my debit card, from the checking account which had just enough money for gas and food for our trip home.

My roommate arrived once the parties were already in full swing. I had already stopped downstairs at the Social Lux party, made a new friend, tried to crash the Obama event, and was in the lobby for the Room 704 party when my roommate found me and asked for the room key. This is when I told her that I had checked in and asked her to stop by the front desk to give them her credit card.

We had different schedules throughout the weekend and, because she was pregnant and woke up with a migraine one morning, I was trying to be especially kind and stayed out of her way. I gave her the cash for my half of the room on Saturday - assuming - of course, that she had gone down to the front desk at some point over the weekend to provide them with her credit card for the room charges.

Saturday night (BowlHer) she called me and asked me if it was OK if a friend of hers spent the night in our room since they were on the same flight the following day. They had to be at the airport early and since her friend was staying at another hotel, she wanted to save money by having her stay with us so that they could avoid the extra taxi fare in the morning.

I'm too kind (or stupid), because instead of asking for money for the extra body in our room, I simply gave up my room that night. I ended up staying with my new friend and yes, perhaps was a little selfish since I spent the night away so I wouldn't be woken up by the two of them packing and getting ready to leave in the morning.

Because I didn't stay in my room, I wasn't able to charge my phone and the battery died some time in the middle of the night. When I woke up, I charged it, only to learn that my roommate had tried calling me.

This is when she informed me that the room had been charged to my card. My debit card. From the checking account that only had enough funds for gas and food for our trip home. I panicked. I called her back immediately but was only able to talk to her long enough for her to cut me off and tell me that she couldn't talk because she was going to miss her flight.

I was furious. Not only was she aware of the fact that the room was charged to my card, but she walked out of the hotel with the cash I gave her. Let's do the math here: I gave her cash for my half of the room. The entire hotel bill was charged to my card and I DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH FUNDS to cover it.

And this is when the Blind Anger kicks in because I cannot recall the details clearly after that but I do know that I tried calling her back to see if she could call the hotel and give them her credit card. She then informed me let that they couldn't charge her card without having her present to sign for it.

I asked her to send me the money via paypal and explained to her that I did not have any money to get us back home. I didn't hear back from her though because she was on her way to the airport and boarding her plane back home.

Chicago would not be the same without visiting Navy Pier but even that was difficult for me to enjoy since I wore out the battery on my phone checking my email every 10 minutes looking for the confirmation from Paypal regarding the payment that my roommate claimed was on its way.

Mamikaze was walking around Navy Pier as well so we walked and talked together, and later that night, I was able to enjoy a *very inexpensive dinner* with Sugar Jones and Shash at the World Famous Billy Goat Tavern and the two of them helped me keep my mind off of my lame-ass roommate and reminded me of how priceless it is to have great friends to laugh and chat with.

We ended up leaving late that evening, after my roommate let me know that her husband had sent payment (for the hotel room PLUS the cash I gave her) to my Paypal account. I was relieved even though I knew that it would take a few days to get the funds.

Wrong. On the road, after using my debit card to fill up the Equiox with gas, I discovered that she had sent the payment as an eCheck, which of course takes 3-5 days to clear. I already have an anxiety disorder, so this just kicked it into high gear as I literally had to put it out of my mind and concentrated on the ride home.

Sugar Jones was a little annoyed that I was in such a foul mood, so we drove and drove, sleeping in the car that night just outside St. Louis since we no longer had funds to spend on a motel room.

We straight through the following day, stopping only for gas and enjoying coffee and Rockstar energy drinks which, as scary as it sounds, prevented us from eating as often (and therefore saving us money).

We picked up Sugar's kids outside of Albuquerque the following night and I cried myself to sleep, missing my son who I was away from for a total of 9 days and for the mistakes, misunderstandings and missteps I took in regards to the money and hotel room.

The eCheck from Paypal cleared on Friday, July 30th. I got the email saying that the funds were now available in my Paypal account, but it still takes another 2 - 4 days to transfer the funds into my checking account. As of this post, the funds are still not in my account. (Trust me, I've been monitoring my account several times a day since last Sunday.)

My son and I have been trying to enjoy the last five days together, but I admit the situation has caused me to be a bit more impatient and irritable, bringing me to tears on several occasions and unfortunately, my son even heard me yelling - and swearing - when my roommate called to try and "work things out."

What I've learned through everything that has happened since arriving in Chicago, and may be something that only those who attended BlogHer can truly understand, is that friends are not simply those that show up for your birthday party or who send you pictures of their families during the holidays.

Friends that I have made online have truly been the most genuine, giving and sincere people that I could hope to know. I had the pleasure of meeting many of them in person last week and there were several people I met last week that I look forward to connecting with online and hopefully again in person at future conferences.

Today is Friendship Day and if you've read this far, you'll understand why I need to say thank you. Thank you for supporting me, listening to my side of the story, backing me up and for offering to send me money during this rough time. I truly could not ask for anything more.

Oh, and one more thing: My anxiety disorder does cause me to deal with things in unusual ways, so my roommate was right. It does totally suck that I got charged overdraft fees each and every time we stopped for gas or ate on the 2,000 mile trip home. And I too am truly sorry that this has occurred.

Growth Spurt

No doubt about it - my son grew since I saw him last. I dropped him off at summer camp last Monday (the 20th) and yesterday morning, when I saw him again, I could not believe how much taller he was! His first tooth is loose and it seems even his vocabulary and maturity level have increased.

I, too, grew in many ways during this past week, having time to reflect, both before and after BlogHer, along the road as Sugar Jones and I drove across country, tweeting and laughing our way from San Diego to Chicago - and back again.

This was my first BlogHer experience, and it did not disappoint. There was as much drama, laughter, drinking and learning involved as I had anticipated. Although it was a bit more intense than I imagined.

It was overwhelming. I felt slightly intimidated, but overall, it was quite humbling to be surrounded by so many great writers that I have been reading and following and even more that I am just now discovering.

As a writer, I appreciate the advice provided during the humor panel, from the talented women on stage (The Bloggess, Bern This) and the many people I met throughout the weekend (Shash, Mr. Lady, Anissa, Shauna, Redneck Mommy, Her Bad Mother and more).

Being away from my son for nine days put things into perspective for me. It reminded me of why I started writing in the first place, why I formed this company two years ago and what it is I so enjoy most of all (being a mother).

I've been laying low this week, trying to put my thoughts into words and wanting so badly to sit down and just write, but instead, I've been spending quality time with my son, stopping only for a few minutes here and there to jot some ideas down, and publishing my best material on Twitter.

My son is sitting next to me right now, on his own computer, creating online adventures that belong only to him, and this weekend, we'll be celebrating summer. Laughing, playing, and growing. Together.

Child's Play X2

What makes Matthew, of Child's Play X2 a happy, healthy, hip dad? I had to travel all the way to Chicago in order to meet him in real life but from chatting with him through Twitter and reading his blog, I knew I could not miss the panel he was speaking on.

Before leaving for our roadtrip, I sent Matthew some questions to ponder so that those who were not familiar with his writing could get a bit more info about who he is, both on and off the web:

1) You started your blog in 2004. Had you done any other writing prior to that?

I had not. In fact, for the first year or two I didn’t even consider what I was putting on my blog as “writing.” Over the years, however, I have come to love the writing aspect. Many of my posts are told in story form or there is a setup to a punch-line and I enjoy crafting those posts.

2) How has blogging changed (for you) since then?

Blogging has changed a lot since I started my blog. My cousin Maggie (Mightygirl.net) turned me onto blogging and back then not many people knew what blogging was. Back then there was a relatively small amount of parent bloggers and we all seemed to be having kids or had young kids. We would add each other to our blog rolls and comment on each other’s blogs and that’s how we built up readership. Now there are so many blogs that it’s very difficult to stand out.

3) Please share the story of how you came to be a speaker on the upcoming panel at this year’s BlogHer.

I’m still not sure how I became a speaker on the BlogHer panel! I was looking at the BlogHer website shortly after registering and noticed there was a proposal for a panel called Vaginally Challenged – The Men of BlogHer. It was proposed by Adam Avitable of Avitable.com. I think I clicked on something that volunteered me for the panel but then I completely forgot about it. Until I got an email saying I had been selected to sit on the panel. I’m very excited about to experience my first BlogHer conference from this perspective.

4) Please share your children’s (nick)names, age and gender.

I have four year old boy/girl twins. My nickname for the boy is TheMonk and my nickname for the girl is Swee’Pea.

5) How do you maintain a healthy relationship with your children? With your wife?

I have maintained a healthy relationship with my children by being as involved in parenting my children as my wife. As a father, I think it’s important that my children see me in a similar way that they see my wife. I also try to maintain consistency with my kids from my wife to me. The kids know that my wife and I will back each other up and that we will consistently enforce rules so there is no pitting mom vs. dad going on.

My kids also know that I am there for them. I keep my promises to them and I think they know they can count on me.

Maintaining a healthy relationship with my wife has been much more difficult. Having twins was extremely challenging for us and the first year, especially, was the most difficult year of our lives. Our relationship certainly took a back seat. We are only now beginning to try and schedule time for the two of us that doesn’t involve kids because it’s so important to keep our relationship strong.

6) Kids say the cutest things. What is the funniest story you recall about each of your children?

Kisses, in our family, have magical healing powers. Boo boos are kissed and made better. One day, my son fell on his butt and when I tried to soothe him, he turned around, stuck his butt in the air and yelled, “KISS IT DADDY! KISS IT!” I did.

My daughter is a devious one who is learning how she can play Daddy like a cheap violin. Just recently she caught me off guard by telling me what a good job I do as a daddy and giving me a piece of chocolate as my reward. I was so touched that my little girl was reaching out to me like that. She then asked for a bite.

7) What is your proudest parenting moment?

I don’t have just one moment. I am proud that my kids see me as an equal parent and that I am equally responsible for the upbringing of my children. I’m proud that I have made the decision to make my children a top priority all of the time.

8) What is your biggest parenting challenge?

My biggest parenting challenge is balancing time for me, my work, my wife and my kids. I always feel like one is suffering and often times it’s the “me time.” I’m trying to figure that one out. If you know the answer, please let me know!

9) What’s your favorite family-friendly restaurant in San Diego?

My favorite family-friendly restaurant in San Diego is Chick-Fil-A. I can get healthy alternatives for the kids, the kids often get a balloon and they can play in the play structure while I eat fries and drink milk shakes.

10) What’s your favorite activity you enjoy with your child(ren)?

I love going to the park with the kids. I love watching my kids take risks on the playground equipment, interact with other kids and then I often play along too. It’s fun being out and about with my kids and I hope I can keep doing well into the future.

11) What advice would you give to new or expecting parents? And to those expecting twins?

New parents need to talk about their parenting philosophy before they have kids. Both parents need to be on the same page about what’s important and what’s not. I think also that moms should help dads become more involved in the parenting – particularly if the dad isn’t sure what his role will be.

As for parenting twins, I think it’s extremely important to get the kids on the same feeding and sleeping schedule from the get go. It will make your life so much easier.

12) Who or where do you go to for parenting advice?

I read blogs and I read books but the biggest person I go to for advice is my wife. She’s an extremely intuitive person and she is a big researcher who has the ability to take information and make it relevant. I don’t know how I would be as parent if I didn’t have her support.

13) How would your children describe you?

My children would describe me as silly, a bad dancer, and someone who loves hugs and kisses.

If you have any other questions about Matthew, his family, his writing, or his appearance at BlogHer, head on over to Child's Play X2. You can discover all you need - or would ever want - to know about him by checking out his list of 100 Things.

The ABCs of Male Bloggers

Because I have always gotten along better with men, I could totally relate to what the guys on today's panel were saying about connecting with women writers and having female friends all their lives. I have connected online with several male bloggers and it was so awesome to see many of them here this weekend.

The fact that we had to come all the way to Chicago to finally hang out in the same room though is rather sad, considering that Matthew of Child's Play lives in San Diego too and Jim of Busy Dad lives just hours away in L.A.

As a single mom, I started to really appreciate and understand my ex-husband a little better after I began to read, from the male perspective, what goes on in their heads and the dynamics within the mom and dad relationship. I have chatted with Busy Dad and Child's Play X2 through Twitter and have really enjoyed getting to know them, both through their blog posts and by communicating directly with them.

Although Avitable is not a daddy blogger, he has a great blog which is very funny and quite raunchy and because he has named his balls and includes stories and pictures of them, it's kind of like the daddy bloggers who share stories of their kids and post pictures of them online!

(L to R: @ChildsPlayX2, @BusyDadBlog, @hip_m0m, @avitable)

Luckily, there was room on the floor so I could sit in the very front for the great panel, that was packed, entitled Vaginally Challenged Bloggers: The Men of BlogHer. Here are a few of my favorite quotes from the session. You'll have to head over to the BlogHer stie for the full transcript and live footage for more!!

Avitable: "I'm the only whore here."


BusyDadBlog: "I thought I pioneered the idea of daddy blogging."

"I'd love to get a book contract."

"I'm here because my friends are here."

"I only exploited my kid once."


ChildsPlayX2: "We're trying to break through the glass ceiling of parenting."

"I've always had more female friends."

Many great conversations were sparked in this session and the women who asked questions added much to the topic. We got to talking about the men of our generation being more involved as fathers and more willing to share their stories and talk about their experiences in a more open manner than our own dads may have. We talked about the husbands who do not blog - or share as openly - and understand that the reason that blogging has brought us all together (online and to Chicago this weekend) is because there is a passion and an understanding amongst all of us writers that extends beyond our title (mommy blogger, daddy blogger, humor blogger).

One of the reasons why the men on the panel are here is because they are such great writers. There are many great female writers here as well, of course, but it's great to see men bloggers represented and supported here in this community.

Miss Brit did a wonderful job moderating this panel and I was so very impressed and inspired by the three men "on stage" who were also very sincere, funny and oh yeah, pretty darn cute.

As one audience member stated, "There's nothing sexier than a good dad." Or a set of balls.

LIVE from Chicago

I'm sitting in a room full, I mean - FULL - of bloggers - women who are writers and who either get paid (0r not) for what they, I mean WE do all day!

We're just SECONDS away from the major announcement this year. They're just making us wait a few minutes before letting us know where BlogHer 2010 will take place and everyone here is bracing themselves and praying that it'll be in their hometown.

At my table are a few women from the Denver - based carpool are hoping that it'll be there and I have to admit that it would be a beautiful place for a conference.

OMG! They're making us WAIT....I swear. This is crazy. I'm getting text messages from my Blog Her Carpoolers ' roommate from somewhere in this room, but where is she? Is she broadcasting LIVE as well?

THERE SHE IS!!

I can see her. She's at the next table and it looks like her coffee mug ...

NEW YORK CITY

Hilton New York
near Rockefeller Center
August 5 - 7, 2010

Woo-hoo!

Oh, and I'm going to head to the GM booth today so that they can set me up with another Test Drive with the 2010 Chevy Camaro.

2010 Chevy Equinox

So, the 2010 Chevy Equinox has been awesome to drive. It was dropped off at my place in San Diego around noon on Monday. I grabbed the keys, signed the Loan Agreement and it was mine. I headed out that afternoon, driving through traffic in Riverside, past the lights of Vegas and finally stopped long enough to close my eyes for a few hours in Cedar City, UT.

Bright and early Tuesday morning, I got in the car and headed straight to Denver, stopping along the way for gas and potty breaks. I somehow scheduled it just right and was able to pick up Sugar Jones at Union Station in downtown Denver just before the traffic rolled in for the Rockies' game.

We literally ran into iGrandmaTV (actually, her friend backed into us when we were parked outside the Union Station). We ended up crashing the Denver Podcasters Meetup and learned about some great sports blogs and podcast sites. We also enjoyed some great beer from the Wynkoop Brewery and visited with some friends.

Sugar took the wheel this morning and now we're making a much-needed pit stop for some shut-eye so we can be ready to land in Chicago mid-morning tomorrow. We had a blast along the way, tweeting and laughing our way through a lightening storm and pulling over so the State Trooper could pull over a car ahead of us. Phew!

There are so many awesome features on the Chevy Equinox that we're enjoying, like the leather seats with the red stitching (so cute!) not to mention the rear-view video camera that allows you to see what's behind you as you're backing up. Oh and your side mirrors rotate down towards the curb as well when you're in reverse so you can see how close (or how far) you are from the curb when parallel parking.

No need to worry about blind spots with this vehicle either, since there's small windows behind the second row seats that let you see that space that is typically out of view. The driver's seat has memory adjustments for two drivers so Sugar and I have both been able to save our settings for where we're most comfortable.

The best thing about the car, in my opinion, is the handling. It's very smooth and with the V6 engine, we were able to pass some pretty slow travelers which allowed us to stay on track after getting slowed down by road construction. The cruise control has awesome settings that allow you to slow down or speed up with a roller button. The fact that it also gets 32 MPG (highway miles) also helped us cut down on our gas expenses!

Since we have no passengers (yet), enjoying the back seat, we'll have to wait until our route home to test out the DVD players but I have a feeling we'll all be pleased with how that works! The back seats are very flat so child or infant car seats will be snug and secure.

The automatic hatchback door also comes in handy as we're usually heading towards the car with our hands full. We're still getting used to "Dolly," the GPS voice we've named for her sweet hospitable charm but she's growing on us as is the XM Radio that we're enjoying as we sing along to the 80s hits that keep us awake.

And, speaking of sing-alongs, Sugar will have some travel games for our trip back West, including a karaoke something or other that is sure to be entertaining. We'll be taking song requests all weekend...

Keep on following us as we journey through BlogHer:

Twitpic:
SugarJones
Hip_M0M

Twitter:
Sugar Jones
Hip_M0M

Mamavation

It's been an amazing ride so far, participating in so many online networks that have led me to some pretty fabulous people. I'm heading to BlogHer this week to meet many of these individuals in real life for the first time, but before I get there, I wanted to stop and talk about one woman who truly has inspired me.

Ali (@PickleSugarPlum) of The Rehan Family, is hoping to be voted in as the first Mamavation Mom and I'm encouraging you all to vote for her as well.

Now, you may know one of the other moms in the running for this and I know they're all equally worthy and as inspiring, but since I know Ali, I wanted to show my support by sharing with her how she's already motivated me, with or without the official title.

I met Ali at the Mom's Nite Out event here in San Diego back in May and have since seen her at Tweetups. I met her husband, learned about her desire to start her own business and have laughed with her over dinner. Nothing about our conversations ever led me to believe that she was uncomfortable with her weight or that it had started to affect her self-esteem.

Many of us use humor to cover up our insecurities. I'm guilty of this, for sure. Growing up, I never had an issue with my weight. I had a healthy pregnancy and was able to lose the weight afterward, but it's been only recently (after my divorce) that I started putting on a few pounds here and there. I've gotten used to asking for larger sizes in the dressing room but that doesn't mean that I'm comfortable with my weight. I make jokes about it and even though I'm constantly swearing at the bathroom scale, no one around me would ever know that my weight was an issue.

I don't want to go into the whole body image thing and how media continues to remind us (and young viewers absorbing it all) that we could all stand to lose a few pounds or change the color of our hair or get those teeth whitened. It's all around us. Every day, the "need" to improve ourselves, physically.

Ali is very brave and I extend to her the biggest congratulations on putting herself out there. You'll see what I mean when you watch her VLOG entry. Voting for the first Mamavation Mom ends soon so head on over and cast your vote. The winner will be announced on July 31st.

Mamavation is a social experiment and weight loss campaign on twitter, created by Bookieboo, an online support group for moms trying to lose weight.

Thelma & Louise - Part 2

Our Chevy vehicle will be delivered next Monday. They promised me it would be dropped off to me between 11 am - 1 pm. I hope it's not like when the Cable Guy promises to be there within a certain time frame. They're notoriously late and even though I'm driving on my own, I do like to have a schedule to follow. (Those of you who know me are laughing right now because I am notoriously late.)

Sugar Jones is relying on me to pick her up in Denver on Tuesday so I'll have to haul butt to get there before the day is over. We're going to spend the night downtown (Is there anything going on in downtown Denver on a Tuesday night?) and our plan is to be in Chicago by the night of the 22nd or early morning on the 23rd. That is if we don't get arrested for disorderly conduct or disturbing the peace along the way. Have you read those weird state laws in Iowa?

Feel free to follow along via the BlogHer website, our own personal blogs (Happy Healthy Hip Parenting and Sugar in the Raw). We'll also be updating the Twitter feed along with our own (@sugarjones, @hip_m0m) and Whrrl along the way!

According to Google maps, it's a 2,062 mile drive, which should take us approximately 30 hours total. We plan on driving 15 hours per day so here's our estimated route:

Monday, July 20th
Depart San Diego, CA
(overnight in Las, Vegas)

Tuesday, July 21st
Stop in Denver, CO

Wednesday, July 22nd
Arrive in Chicago, IL

For those of you who live along the route, help us out! Let us know where we should stop for food, restroom breaks or if we can come over for a home-cooked meal!

To check out the other carpools heading to Chicago, follow the Interactive Map to see where the Seattle group is or The Blogrollers from Atlanta!

Did someone say roadtrip?!

The craziest thing about my upcoming roadtrip to Chicago is that it was someone else's idea. I don't want to take complete credit for this adventure I'm about to take! You see, originally Caryn, of Rockin' Mama, invited me to join in for the ride. She convinced me to drive from beautiful San Diego to the Windy City and I somehow jumped on the opportunity. She had also asked Amanda, of Mommy Mandy, to accompany us and everything was all set (not in stone, however).

Things happen for a reason, and with Caryn's pregnancy and Mandy's plans changing, I'm now driving on my own to Denver, where I'll pick up Sugar Jones. It's bound to get crazy after that!

Even though we're not taking the kids on this trip (maybe next time), there are many families heading out on the road this summer. Here's some great activities, toys and games that would help keep the kiddos occupied on a long car ride (no batteries required):

USA Map Pillowcase ($25)
www.colormecompany.com

Kid Kase ($60)
www.theactivechild.com


Lap Doodle Board ($15)
http://www.gingersnapskids.com/write01.html


Road Games 1– Sound Effects CD ($10)



Klutz Kids Travel: A Backseat Survival Kit ($14)
www.klutz.com

Klutz Road Trip Trivia ($13)
www.klutz.com


Kids' Interstate Road Atlas ($5)
www.fatbraintoys.com

Happy Travels!

While in Chicago...

Even though I'm heading to Chicago without my child in a few weeks, I'm looking forward to the day when he is old enough to handle all-day trips to museums and explore the many sites that the Windy City has to offer.

For those of you who are bringing kids to BlogHer, or who plan on taking them to Chicago someday, here's a list of just some of the things that you will want to make time for:

1. Wrigley Field
   
2. Shedd Aquarium
3. Field Museum of Natural History
   
4. Adler Planetarium & Museum
   
5. Museum of Science & Industry
6. Art Institute
7. Navy Pier
8. Chicago Children's Museum
9. Lincoln Park Zoo
10. John Hancock Observatory

Do you live in Chicago? Have you taken your kids there recently? Let us know what your favorite sights are or better yet, where to find family-friendly restaurants throughout the city.

DriveHer

So, you know when you tell your kids that they're driving you crazy? I say that often and usually my son knows I'm joking and he'll say the same thing to me when he's in a silly mood. Lately, though, I've been thinking about the whole driving thing and how I'm about to head out on a roadtrip in a few weeks that'll take me over 2,000 miles - without my son. Now, that's crazy!

Even though my BlogHer trip is not (yet) sponsored, it is, sort of. You see, Chevy, the carpool sponsor, will be providing me with a brand-spanking-new Chevy Tahoe Hybrid to drive from my house here in San Diego to the Sheraton in Chicago. They may even be able to provide the 2010 Chevy Equinox if it arrives in time! Either way, I'm taking a much-needed bathroom break in Denver to pick up my dear friend and fellow San Diegan, Sugar Jones!

The last time I drove halfway across the country was when my friend from college convinced me to move to San Diego ten years ago. I had never even stepped foot in California before, but there was a lot of drama going on in my life at the time and I really needed a change of scenery.

I knew nothing about San Diego, other than what I had heard about the perfect weather and beautiful beaches. Is there really anything else you need to know after growing up in Minnesota?!

My friend's sister joined us on the road trip and we had a blast, stopping in Breckenridge, Denver and Albuquerque along the way. We had so many crazy experiences, met a lot of cool people and spent a lot longer on the road that we had originally anticipated.

I love Chicago. I used to drive there with my friends for the weekend during college. We'd check out the museums during the day and hit up the bars at night. I don't know when we ever slept, but I have a feeling BlogHer is going to be pretty much the same. Seriously, we'll all be partying like it's 1999!

Looking Forward

As a single mom, it's hard at times to find others that I am able to confide in when it comes to talking about the butterflies that I experience and nervous excitement that I have before a date or when I meet someone who I’m attracted to. It's not often that it happens so it's during the dry spells that I'm there as a confidante, therapist and friend to others. I’m there for those seeking comfort, looking for someone who can listen and understand what they're going through.

I'm there for my friends who have either given up on love or are still trying to comprehend the relationships - and mistakes - from their past. My entire life has been dedicated to helping and listening to others. I'm a great listener. I don't think there's anyone that knows me that would tell you otherwise. Which is why, at times, I really feel the need to unleash and spill my guts to those who can also understand and who listen to me as I provide way too much information about an escapade that I've encountered or complain about a dry spell that's gone on for far too long.

Often, I spend my time online visiting the sites and blogs of other single parents - both moms and dads - who have encountered the same issues that I have. The Single Parents Connection on Facebook has a growing list of blogs dedicated to single parents. I'm honored to be included among such honest and humorous writers.

Prior to my divorce, I was the mom who worked over 50 hours a week, feeling guilty about not being there for my son, missing out on so much as he grew up and changed in the blink of an eye while I built my career, being the breadwinner and putting all of my energy into my job, not realizing that I was neglecting my husband and child at the same time.

We all make sacrifices for our family and there is always a choice to be made. Seeing the other side of it now, the work-at-home mom who wants to provide for her child, who has so much to offer and supply as a nurturing, sympathetic caregiver who wishes she could turn back time.

There’s also another side to that. I also need and crave that female energy, the bond that has brought women together for centuries, which is maybe one of the main reasons why I’m so looking forward to attending my first BlogHer conference.

I have met so many great and inspiring women in this lifetime. I have been lucky enough to have sat with some brilliant individuals, learning so much as they guide me and help me learn from, not only their mistakes, but teach me to learn from my own.

If you’re attending BlogHer in just a few weeks, drop me a line, let me know what you’re most looking forward to (be honest) and what your concerns are. I know a lot of people are worried that it’ll be like high school again. Cliques and popularity contests is not something I would want to experience again, but I also know that the bonds that have been created by women – either online or meeting in person in the past – are hard to break.

I hope to meet many new friends and have a chance to really listen to what everyone has to say. I do my best work that way.

About Last Night

I'm not sure what happened this last week. It was all such a whirlwind, trying to get everything ready for the 2nd Annual Parenting Party last night.

My dearest friends came to support me and I met some fantastic moms and dads that are passionate about parenting so the event was a success and everyone who came had a great time.

Just to re-cap the night, here are the great sponsors and advertisers who made the event possible and who offered some fabulous giveaways to those who attended:

• Songbirds Music
• Usborne Books & More
• Chocolat
• Indigo Village
• La Jolla Learning Works
• Time Out Mom
• Lakeshore Learning Materials

I do have some Goodie Bags leftover if anyone wants one! I'll be bringing them to the upcoming events to hand out, such as Baby Time Expo and BlogHer (if there's any left by then).

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming...

How I really feel about GM: The ultimate test-drive

I purchased my ticket to BlogHer at the end of February since I knew that it would eventually be sold out, like it had been in the past. I was able to get in before the price went up but I had no idea how I would get to Chicago or who I'd end up hanging out with. All I knew is that I had to be there this year.

Money is always an issue for single moms, but this year, especially, I've been watching my spending and limiting any unnecessary expenses. So, when Rockin' Mama contacted me about joining her carpool, I said, "Yes," right away. I mean, I agreed so quickly that she had to ask me several times if I wanted to think about it.

These are the sorts of things that one should not think about for too long, or all of the negative aspects of driving cross-country in the middle of the summer start to take precedence above all other thoughts. For example, stinky feet and armpits at 80 MPH is worse than slow-moving BO. Trust me - I've driven across the country before.

Exactly ten years ago this June, I picked up and moved to San Diego with my girlfriend. The two of us and her sister drove from Western Wisconsin to San Diego with a 17' U-Haul truck. My friend's Mustang was pulled along behind on a lift.

I'll share the whole story another time but for now, just know that after that experience, I vowed to never again drive cross country in anything other than a car, truck or mini-van.

Mommy Mandy will be joining Rockin' Mama and I (aka Hip Mom) as we trek from Southern California, through NV, AZ, UT, CO, NE, and IA before reaching our final destination. in IL. Traveling in such tight quarters with people we barely know is bound to create a bit of drama and, although I don't consider myself high maintenance (all of the time), it should definitely make for an interesting ride.

It is expected to take us a few days to get there (2,065 miles) and we'll be blogging on our respective sites about the journey. If you know of some good places to stop in the cities and towns we'll be driving through, please let us know. We'll be looking for some great little restaurants to make us some yummy and healthy meals. We'll also be recruiting volunteers to invite us to their house for dinner, or inside for potty breaks.

As for our vehicle, GM is, once again, the sponsoring carpool provider for this year's BlogHer conference, so we'll be able to test drive one of their Chevy vehicles - in every sense of the word. We'll also be testing each other's limits so stay tuned for more details on when we'll be leaving and how we plan on surviving the drive without killing one another - or ourselves.

No matter what you think of GM and their role in the economy, we ask that you support us as we leave our kids behind, jump in the driver's seat (we'll be taking turns, of course) and make our way to the Windy City in, hopefully, an SUV or something big enough to carry us and all of our equipment (ie. shoes, make-up, clothing, food, beverages, reading materials, laptops, etc.).

Oh, and in case anyone is wondering - YES - we do plan on stopping in Vegas and Denver for some fun. Sponsors interested in helping us with the cost of gas, snacks or meals & lodging should contact us ASAP. Since there's three of us recruiting, we're bound to have some pretty major investors helping us get across the states, safe and sound.

Who's in?

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About a week ago, I was contacted by BlogHer contributor, Elana Centor, after she read one of my Facebook status updates about losing my job at the beginning of the year. She was writing a post about losing one's job and how children react. She was hoping to chat about my experience for her article. We tried to arrange a phone interview but our schedules never allowed us to talk over the phone.

One night, about 2am my time, I was getting caught up on my friends' status updates on Facebook when an IM chat screen opened up. It was Elana, also experiencing insomnia, so we began to instant message about the interesting conversations I had with my son. about getting laid off. She's pretty much captured the gist of it in the final article.