Tuesday, March 10, 2009

How Do You Define Love?

Around Valentine's Day, my son's teacher got married. They talked about her wedding in the classroom and we talked about it at home, as well. One night, just before bed, he asked me if I had ever been married to his dad. I told him that we had been married and when he asked for how many minutes, I smiled, and told him that we had been married for thousands of minutes. He liked that answer, but then went on to tell me that his dad no longer loves me.

I think about that word quite often ever since we had this discussion. We use the word, "love," quite frequently in everyday conversation, and yet, my son, at age 5, understands that it is also a word reserved for a special type of relationship that no longer exists between his father and I.

Without hesitating, I told my son that night that I still love his father, and that I don't love him, or anyone else, because I expect anything in return.
  • I love ice cream.
  • I love my new shoes.
  • I love your new haircut.
  • I love it when you smile.
  • I love that song.
  • I love getting hugs.
  • I love watching the sunset.
  • I love singing my son to sleep.
Many people find it difficult to express this type of love and understanding. I tell my current boyfriend that I love him and I am perfectly fine with the fact that he is not able to reciprocate since he lets me know in other ways how much I mean to him.

To me, love is acceptance, understanding and appreciation. I am very grateful for the role certain people play in my life.

I know that loving others is all about accepting them for who they are, knowing that they are perfect in every way, my ex-husband included.

I love the fact that he calls me just to tell me how our son's day was. I love that he and our son met me for breakfast to have a Family Meeting over the weekend. I love my son's father for being such an amazing dad and putting our son first at all times.

I love the fact that I don't have to worry about a thing when my son is with his dad. I can sleep in, or go to bed early and trust that our son is taken care of and will be back with me when it's "my time," to be with him again. I love the fact that my son gets the best of both worlds. He learns so much from me and just as much from his father. He truly is lucky to have such loving and passionate parents.

Just recently, after another discussion about self-acceptance, my son looked in the mirror and said, "I love you." Now, when I say these same words to him he responds, "I love me too," and I know that he truly gets it.

I love our family. The three of us are unique, beautiful and perfect. What's not to love?

None of this self-acceptance and unconditional love would have been possible without the Knowledge of Y.O.U. Grounded in science and founded in nature, the Y.O.U. Consulting Group has brought me such great understanding and freedom that I want to share it with everyone I meet. I'm currently a Certified Level III Practitioner and look forward to introducing you to the Knowledge. For information or to meet with me for a one-on-one consultation, please email me directly for details.

1 comment:

Carrie said...

i'm really glad to see this post. i've been struggling with the meaning of love for almost two months now. my boyfriend and i broke up in the beginning of february because he's confused about the meaning of love and doesn't think he loves me. but right now we have this really strange relationship where we're still going on dates once or twice a week even though we're not together anymore. i've been trying to explain to him what i think love is and how if he still wants to be my best friend he must love me on some level but it hasn't been working