"Children from families with high expectations and values tend to find each other, have good marriages and continue to produce quality children despite what the environmental influences may be."This is a statement made by Dr. Val Farmer before he outlines his ideas behind what it takes to be a good parent in today's culture.
While I question Dr. Farmer's definition of "quality children" (vs. non-quality children?), I do agree with many of his suggested ingredients for successful parenting. Below is my edited version of his list:
1. Be a good example.
2. Be attentive to each child's needs.
3. Accept and respect each child as individuals. Help them become responsible in their decision making. Respect their basic dignity as developing human beings with minds and lives of their own.
4. Know your values and pass on those values while children are young.
5. Bond your children to those who share similar values and beliefs. Involvement in community will be of great support to family life.
6. Be consistent, firm and fair in your discipline. Teach responsibility and the work ethic through family duties.
7. Minimize conflict and criticism within the family.
8. Accept and tolerate individual preferences while focusing attention on important values and principles.
9. Teach them to respect your authority as well as outside authority.
10. Teach them to show kindness, appreciation and tolerance for others from different races, religions and in all walks of life. Help them learn to give service to others and the community.
11. Help them develop a joy of reading and learning.
12. Have fun in the family. Create memories. Do things together that are special and different. Celebrate birthdays, holidays and special days with gusto and enthusiasm. Work and play together. Use those moments to love, teach and cherish them.
13. Provide gentle guidance and opportunities for your children to meet and develop friendships. Friendships are laboratories for learning about morality and the give-and-take in relationships.
14. Help them develop their talents and abilities. Their sense of self will grow as they explore their likes and dislikes and take pleasure in their accomplishments. Attend and support their activities. School success and extra-curricular activities build self-worth.
15. Have family meals together - it is important. The food and family interaction nurtures more than the body. It is a time of sharing and bonding.
16. Love them and encourage them.
1 comment:
That's an awesome list and should be written in a parent's bible somewhere because we sure don't see enough of them in active parenting. Thanks for posting those.
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